WASHINGTON, D.C. – Donald Trump says that because of his many world-wide connections in every field of endeavor he has just come across a newly discovered pill that when taken orally will totally destroy the Coronavirus within 45 minutes.
POTUS said that the wonder pill, which he has named the “Ivankanella -7” in honor of his eldest daughter, interestingly enough was developed in Guatemala, one of the poorest countries in the entire world.
He pointed out that the government of Guatemala granted him the exclusive rights in exchange for him promising to never invade Guatemala.
A leading expert on pharmaceutical pills disclosed that President Trump could end up personally making upwards of $17 billion just within the next 12 months.
IN CLOSING – Trump pointed out that the “Ivankanella-7” pills will only be available for purchase in the lobby of the Trump Tower in Manhattan. He did point out that, at the present time, he is working out a deal to sell the pills in every WalMart, Victoria’s Secret Lingerie Store, and McDonalds in America.