Nashville Realtor Finds Online Dating More of a Seller's Market

Funny story written by Chrissy Benson

Friday, 8 November 2019

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In this dating economy, Mike Fordham is prepared to move swiftly when he finds the right person within his price range.

Single for over three years, real estate agent Mike Fordham of Nashville, Tennessee, dipped his toe into the world of online dating, only to find it to be more of a seller's market.

"What these women are asking is out of control," sad Fordham. "I'm just looking for a cozy, comfortable living situation, preferably with two separate bathrooms, within my price range. And location is also key."

Unfortunately, says Fordham, he's finding that list prices for what he's looking for are off the charts. "And no one seems to want to negotiate."

According to Fordham, single women want a man with a steady income stream, who's reliable, responsible, and loyal, but who's also funny, charming, spontaneous, sexy, and kind of a bad boy. "They have all these demands, but they themselves are not willing to give an inch," said Fordham. "They're all explicitly on the market 'as is.'"

He added, "I'm not looking for a fixer-upper."

Still, Fordham is persevering, keeping his romantic goals and parameters at the forefront of his mind, while staying cognizant that, in this dating economy, the odds are stacked against him. "Fortunately, I can be decisive when I need to be. I'm prepared to move swiftly when I find the right option within my budget."

And, despite the challenges, Fordham says he remains optimistic about his prospects of finding love. "I'm going to view someone Friday night that I feel really good about, at least based on the pictures," he said. "She'll probably be weighing lots of offers, but that's fine. I can do the dance."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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