New York City, NY - (Teenage Glandular Secretions): There is feverish internet speculation tonight amid claims of a Justice Department stitch-up, after convicted serial pervert, Jeffrey Epstein, was busted at his swanky Upper East Side home.
The sexagenarian billionaire’s arrest sees US attorney General William Barr officially recused from oversight of proceedings on grounds of possible ‘contamination’.
His previous involvement in the defendant’s underage sex court cases bars Barr from current litigation which could potentially see Epstein jailed for up to 45 years.
Commenting on the Justice Department impasse, a NYC deep throat told Spoof website reporters that ‘it all boils down to over-active teenage glans’.
Epstein, 69, is scheduled to appear at a NYC bail hearing on July 15, but until then will remain behind Barr’s.