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Funny satire stories about Jeffrey Epstein

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Funny story: Epstein To Be Charged With His Own Murder

Epstein To Be Charged With His Own Murder

Things just keep on getting worse and worse for disgraced former financier, Jeffrey Epstein, who, after he had been arrested and held for sexual offences against children, then wound up dead, and, this morning, was charged with his own murder by stra...

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Funny story: Hannibal Lector Scores New Epstein Lampshade: Where’s The Meat?

Hannibal Lector Scores New Epstein Lampshade: Where’s The Meat?

BILLINGSGATE POST: A newly-released video showing forensic psychiatrist and taxidermist, Dr. Hannibal Lecter, carrying a lampshade out of the Metropolitan Correctional Center in New York City, was released this morning as part of the probe into the...

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Funny story: Epstein autopsy now official at "assisted suicide"

Epstein autopsy now official at "assisted suicide"

Although Barbara Sampson, New York's chief medical examiner, has announced the cause of Epstein's death as "pending", inside sources now say an official determination has been reached. Ms. Sampson stated that no single cause can as yet be determin...

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Funny story: Epstein Body Not His: El Chapo Was Last Cellmate

Epstein Body Not His: El Chapo Was Last Cellmate

BILLINGSGATE POST: Adding to the mystery of the presumed death of notorious multimillionaire pedophile, Jeffrey Epstein, was a report that the body found in Epstein’s cell was cremated before an autopsy was performed, and that no signs of choke mar...

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Funny story: Jeffrey Epstein’s Hole-In-One At Trump Creepy Hollow

Jeffrey Epstein’s Hole-In-One At Trump Creepy Hollow

Creepy Hollow, New York - (Fore! Play News): Convicted predatory sex monster, Jeffrey Epstein, who died in a Manhattan jail cell this weekend, reportedly scored his best-ever hit at one of President Trump’s famous putting greens, according to files...

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Funny story: Jeffrey Epstein 'Suicide Watch' Explained

Jeffrey Epstein 'Suicide Watch' Explained

Following intense criticism of the US prison authorities for allowing disgraced financier Jeffrey Epstein to take his own life in his cell, even after having been on a Suicide Watch, the warden at the facility has spoken out to explain what a 'Suicid...

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Funny story: Jeffrey Epstein 'Suicide' Is "Sketchy At Best", Says Criminal Network

Jeffrey Epstein 'Suicide' Is "Sketchy At Best", Says Criminal Network

The death in custody of financier, and alleged sex pest, Jeffrey Epstein, could not have happened completely by his own hand, according to the criminal underground. Epstein was found lifeless in his cell yesterday, and his corpse was rushed to a M...

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Funny story: Prince Andrew Impassive Over Jeffrey Epstein Death

Prince Andrew Impassive Over Jeffrey Epstein Death

The death in his cell of suspected sex trafficker, Jeffrey Epstein, has had no visible effect whatsoever, on the affairs of Prince Andrew, it has been reported. Financier Epstein was being held in prison for offences he was alleged to have commit...

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Funny story: Trump World Coming To Number 10 Downing Street, London

Trump World Coming To Number 10 Downing Street, London

How? Great Britain's ambassador, to the United States, Sir Kim Darroch, sent secret diplomatic cables to his home office stating Donald Trump was inept, dysfunctional, and stupid. Ouch! At least he didn’t mention his hair, makeup or girth.

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Funny story: Epstein already working on groundbreaking provisions for his next jail time

Epstein already working on groundbreaking provisions for his next jail time

Confined at this time without bail, Mr. Epstein is reported already feverishly at work with his lawyers. At issue is the question of what conditions will attend his imprisonment--if he is once again sentenced to jail time. In his previous confi...

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Funny story: Epstein, Swinestein, The Pervs Just Keep Coming

Epstein, Swinestein, The Pervs Just Keep Coming

New York City, NY - (ReUterus): Emergency flack jackets have been issued to members of the New York Barr Association ahead of predicted fallout in NYC’s latest perversion of justice case. A claque of former lawyers and publicists for convicted ju...

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Funny story: New production of Hamlet will star Nancy Pelosi and Bill Clinton

New production of Hamlet will star Nancy Pelosi and Bill Clinton

A new and glitzy version of Hamlet is in rehearsal as part of the Democrat's autumn campaign for Presidential Election 2020. Casting and script problems continue to plague the production, however, with Ms. Pelosi reported not happy. Ms. Pelosi...

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Funny story: Esha Gupta case leads to global campaign against “eye rape” (male restraints under consideration)

Esha Gupta case leads to global campaign against “eye rape” (male restraints under consideration)

Bollywood actress, Esha Gupta, has recently found new fame by accusing a hotelier in Delhi of “raping her with his eyes.” Ms. Gupta further explained that the man continually stared at her for a long time and was a “future rapist.” She denied t...

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Funny story: Jeffrey Epstein Invites Women’s Soccer Team To His Mansion

Jeffrey Epstein Invites Women’s Soccer Team To His Mansion

BILLINGSGATE POST: After turning down offers to visit the White House and the International House of Pancakes, the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team accepted an offer from Jeffrey Epstein to visit his mansion in New York City. A ticker-tape parade through...

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Funny story: Putin Ridicules Trump’s 4th Of July Parade

Putin Ridicules Trump’s 4th Of July Parade

Vladimir Putin belittled Trump’s parade. Seriously, like a schoolyard chant, it was a case of, “Mine is bigger than yours.” Putin’s mockery sparked the question: Could this romance be over? No more three-hour private meetings with only a Russian tran...

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Funny story: Attorney General Recusal As Epstein-Barr Goes Viral

Attorney General Recusal As Epstein-Barr Goes Viral

New York City, NY - (Teenage Glandular Secretions): There is feverish internet speculation tonight amid claims of a Justice Department stitch-up, after convicted serial pervert, Jeffrey Epstein, was busted at his swanky Upper East Side home. The...

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Funny story: Cops' strip poker showdown defrocks Beatrice and Eugenie

Cops' strip poker showdown defrocks Beatrice and Eugenie

London - A Royal Protection Racket cops' straight flush has stripped useless royal slappers Beatrice and Eugenie. Prince Andrew's molls were caught 'frightening the whorses' and now see their 24/7 bodyguards axed in the austerity cuts. A radica...

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