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Funny satire stories about Robert Mueller

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Alexandria “The Great” Ocasio-Cortez Calls Slim Everdingle “Bum F*ck”

Funny story: Alexandria “The Great” Ocasio-Cortez Calls Slim Everdingle “Bum F*ck”

BILLINGSGATE POST: If life were fair, Slim Everdingle would have taken a pass when he was first introduced to Alexandria “The Great.” She was a bartender in a sleazy saloon in a bad section of the Bronx that catered mainly to pimps, prostitutes and...

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Don’t Worry About Missing Sex Files, Pope Is Told, Bob Mueller Has A Copy

Funny story: Don’t Worry About Missing Sex Files, Pope Is Told, Bob Mueller Has A Copy

Rome, Italy - (Reuters): “Phew, Your Eminence,” the Pontifical Attorney for the Holy Spanish Inquisition said today as a Vatican conference on sex abuse ‘laughed itself silly’ on hearing the Pope’s predecessors had systematically destroyed abuse arc...

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Mayan Chief Agrees To Pay For Wall: Expects Exclusive Human Sacrifice Rights

Funny story: Mayan Chief Agrees To Pay For Wall: Expects Exclusive Human Sacrifice Rights

BILLINGSGATE POST: The ancient Mayans only surviving leader, High Chief Hokum, announced from his office in the Yucatan that he will pay for Trump's wall on the border of the United States and Mexico in exchange for any human sacrifice rights forth...

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Jared Kushner Snafues Fifth Avenue With NRA Pistol Range

Funny story: Jared Kushner Snafues Fifth Avenue With NRA Pistol Range

New York, NYC - (Rotters): FBI agents are studying reports that a 2015 Manhattan-wide temporal lobotomy** triggered a former bigwig prosecutor’s unsolved drive-by shooting according to statements plagiarised from a Russian fake news site. This mo...

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Trump’s Albino Raccoon Hairpiece To Be Indicted: A Gift From Vladimir Putin

Funny story: Trump’s Albino Raccoon Hairpiece To Be Indicted: A Gift From Vladimir Putin

BILLINGSGATE POST: BUZZNUTTS, the official source of leaks from Mueller’s Special Counsels Office, verified that the albino raccoon hairpiece that was given to Mr. Trump by Vladimir Putin shortly after he was elected will be indicted. The controver...

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Trump Goes Freudian: Calls Mueller A “Preverted Shackle Maniac”

Funny story: Trump Goes Freudian: Calls Mueller A “Preverted Shackle Maniac”

BILLINGSGATE POST: If anyone believed President Trump would throw the towel in after seeing Roger Stone in shackles, they should think again. It was earlier reported that Robert Mueller had approved of a Tomahawk Missile strike on Roger Stone i...

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Rump Chump Denies Meddling In Russian Rillette Probe

Funny story: Rump Chump Denies Meddling In Russian Rillette Probe

Tamper, Florida - (Rumpy-Dumpy News): Bob Mueller’s Rasher Inquiry took a dramatic new turn today with the arrest of an old mucker pal of President Don T Rump. Ex-GOP pork bellies peddler Roger Stoned got a 6am federal house call at his Tamper, F...

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Slim Everdingle Raids FBI HQ: Snaps Compromising Photos Of Comey And Mueller

Funny story: Slim Everdingle Raids FBI HQ: Snaps Compromising Photos Of Comey And Mueller

BILLINGSGATE POST: In what Sean Hannity describes as the most audacious attack on the FBI since Baby Face Nelson in 1934, Slim Everdingle and his faithful companion, Detrick "Dirty Trick" Detwiler, broke into the offices of former FBI Directors James...

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Mad Mueller, A Parody

Mad Mueller on a wintry day, rocked the office with a "Hey, Why no indictment of Trump the Younger? For news like that the press does hunger." Swearing, "Damn rot!" he sent out a plea, warning his aides from sea to sea, "We've got to get Tr...

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Trump Calls Mueller A "Smelly Imitation Lawyer"

Funny story: Trump Calls Mueller A "Smelly Imitation Lawyer"

BILLINGSGATE POST: In a previous news story, the repulsive character, Flyface, was introduced as Robert Mueller's alter-ego. Unsure of whether Mueller (Flyface) will call for his impeachment when he finally winds up his report, the frustrated Trum...

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Mueller To Trump: “Dont Call Me Flyface.”

Funny story: Mueller To Trump: “Dont Call Me Flyface.”

BILLINGSGATE POST:. Newsworthy or not, has a sitting president ever called the man charged with investigating him such a despicable name? I think not. “Flyface” connotes an image of incredible filth and ugliness. Notwithstanding the fact that Robe...

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‘Mole’ Spotted In Mueller Nude Russian Selfie Snap

Funny story: ‘Mole’ Spotted In Mueller Nude Russian Selfie Snap

Washington AC/DC - (Spotty Ass Mess): A distinctive birth mark, potentially a mole, has been discovered on the naked buttocks of a Russian selfie in Robert Mueller’s ongoing Pootin Probe. The move comes after last week’s FBI seizure of data item m...

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Galapagos Twitchers In A Flap At FBI Grand Jury Subpoena

Funny story: Galapagos Twitchers In A Flap At FBI Grand Jury Subpoena

Galápagos Islands, Ecuador - (Agencies, Associated Mess): There are reports this weekend that FBI Special Counsel Robert Mueller has subpoenaed a dozen indigenous Ecuadorian ‘bird watchers’ in the ongoing Rump Golden Showers Witch *unt probe. Pap...

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Mueller wonders whether he should just get up the courage and ask Trump whether he colluded.

Funny story: Mueller wonders whether he should just get up the courage and ask Trump whether he colluded.

After spending months asking friends of Trump, hinting that he was interested, or hoping he'd make the first move, top sources report Robert Mueller may just go out and ask Trump whether he colluded. "Yeah, I'm tired of dancing around it, and I think...

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Trump To Resign

Funny story: Trump To Resign

Trump to resign! He'll squeal to Mueller. Claimed he said, "Mueller's one great guy! He’s a man with real guts and good ideas. I love the guy. He also looks a lot like Gregory Peck.” Then added, “When Peck was alive. There's no truth to the rumor...

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Slim And Dirty Discuss Skanks, Mueller And The Quasimodo Effect

Funny story: Slim And Dirty Discuss Skanks, Mueller And The Quasimodo Effect

BILLINGSGATE POST: Regardless of your political leanings, a chance to be privy to a once-in-life-time conversation between Slim Everdingle and Detrick “Dirty Trick” Detwiler as they talk about the ultimate trifecta; Skanks, Mueller and the Quasimodo...

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Michael Cohen Lying About Not Telling The Truth?

Funny story: Michael Cohen Lying About Not Telling The Truth?

There have been some sensational scenes in US politics this week, with Michael Cohen, the one-time attorney of US president, Donald Trump, freely admitting under questioning that he had previously lied to Congress when he said that Trump had ceased n...

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Michael Cohen: Sasha Made Me Sing Like A Canary

Funny story: Michael Cohen: Sasha Made Me Sing Like A Canary

BILLINGSGATE POST: "When The Twilight Is Gone And No Songbirds Are Singing." But the songbirds were singing. Michael Cohen just performed acapella for James Mueller, or so he thought. Although both have the same surname, Michael and Sasha Bar...

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