US agency to receive “Laundryland and Sunshine Award” for actions in the new century so far

Written by joseph k winter

Thursday, 14 March 2019

image for US agency to receive “Laundryland and Sunshine Award” for actions in the new century so far
Shambless and Pure Perception Management Co. reps at work in Laundryland on a normal day

The New York Times has revealed a security agency operating as a gigantic laundromat, which specializes in "protecting national interests.”

This laundromat (aka "Laundryland") houses enormous scrubbing machines that dwarf an ordinary facility's washing and drying equipment.

Workers ascend on elevator platforms wheeled here and there for the spinning, scrubbing, drying, and folding functions.

(Planning for tours of this laundering facility, at a cost of $19.95 per individual, is currently underway.)

This facility has been developed in line with Karl Rove’s famous dictum from earlier this century in describing the neoconservative program that the US has been following since the election of Bill Clinton.

Mr. Rove:

“We’re an empire now, and when we act, we create our own reality. And while you’re studying that reality — judiciously, as you will — we’ll act again, creating other new realities, which you can study too, and that’s how things will sort out. We’re history’s actors . . . and you, all of you, will be left to just study what we do.”

Mr. Rove’s viewpoint here is the foundation of “perception management” programs judiciously followed by mainstream news corporations at this time.

Representatives of these corporations hasten to add that "perception management is NOT brainwashing."

Additionally, at this time, The New York Times, has seen fit to honor Laundryland as its most reliable source, and promote this distinguished award.

It has done so "in the spirit of rewarding a government protection program that all Americans should be proud of.”

This “Laundryland and Sunshine Award” is a direct tribute to the masterful cleansing and scrubbing being done to keep the public (including the global audience) informed on America’s current “reality programs,” in keeping with Mr. Rove’s defining principle above.

Further, a new amendment to the Constitution is under construction by the Nancy Pelosi branch of the Democratic Party in the spirit of Mr. Rove’s contribution.

This amendment will read as follows:

“The current reality of what is important to America, its investment programs, and its national defense enterprises, shall be defined by administrative agencies within the Congress in consultation with the Chief Executive.”

Here is a list of representative examples of what “creating-our-own-reality” programs means for this new century**:

*that 19 al quaida terrorists, armed only with box cutters, perpetrated the 9/11 attack, including demolition of the twin towers and Building 7 by explosives;

*that Palestine is terrorist and uncooperative in response to Israeli democracy, and must be restrained with bombing, strafing, shooting, imprisoning, and further territorial acquisitions for the settlers in the face of stone-throwing resistance;

*that the War in Yemen is an unfathomable rebellion of terrorist-aligned people and children resisting the human rights-oriented country Saudi Arabia;

*that Mr. Mohammed Bin Salman (MBS) is an enlightened spirit interested in democracy in his country although temporarily that requires arresting and torturing politically critical females and using a bone saw on a prominent critic of the administration;

*that Saudi Arabia and Egypt are shining examples of the democracy the US wishes to export across the globe;

*that North Korea is entirely untrustworthy in not being willing to hand over its entire arsenal of weapons prior to any sanctions relief from the US;

*that Venezuela’s problems are totally self-inflicted via incompetence, and have nothing to do with a campaign to deny the legitimately elected leader Maduro, or with US sanctions and other behaviors intended to make the people of Venezuela surrender and accept US-appointed representative, Juan Guaido.

The Award Ceremony is planned for July 4.

**(List compiled by Shambless and Pure Perception Management Inc.)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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