Sea walnut organism’s anus-on-demand feature being studied toward possible evolutionary changes in political parties

Funny story written by joseph k winter

Friday, 8 March 2019

image for Sea walnut organism’s anus-on-demand feature being studied toward possible evolutionary changes in political parties
These specimens of Mnemiopsis leidyl are due for interviews at CNN soon

Scientists are now offering new reports on the Mnemiopsis leidyl organism, called the Sea Walnut, also known as the Comb Jelly.

Speculation has spread widely that the new information signifies information on evolutionary advances, particularly for political parties.

This particular species has the unusual feature of what is known as the “anus-on-demand” (AOD).

That is, when food decay builds up at the exterior of its skin, it creates its own anus.

Following discharge, the anus disappears.

To explain further, Mnemiopsis leidyl has no direct piping from gut to an external anus, as with most animals. Instead, waste builds up on its exterior area.

The advantages of this anus-on-demand feature have stunned various industries and the politicians.

Love-doll assembly houses and certain brothels in Europe (so far) are engaged in new programs with it.

To be able to advertise the “on-demand” feature of this or that anatomical assembly is an advantage to both robot and human in the services business.

Sex-services operators could wear necklaces with the letters AOD featured, for example.

Further, Nancy Pelosi has also seen fit to apply this idea of how The Democratic Party can rid itself of fecal matter.

The “anus-on-demand” feature can either be implemented--or not, as with the inspiring model of Mnemiopsis leidyl as guidance.

In the case of the anti-semitism accusations leveled at Congressional Representative Ilhan Omar, for example, anus-on-demand seemed automatic.

After all, it is downright irresponsible and ungrateful to say anything negative about Israel and Israel’s lobbying forces.

Ms. Omar had the temerity to suggest Israel enjoys favor to a state of near reverence by American politicians. But this critical viewpoint was considered “anti-semitic.”

However, to the surprise of Ms. Pelosi et al a howling noise of indignation arose from Ms. Omar’s followers, who turn out to be considerable and growing.

Ms. Pelosi’s resolution to censor Ms. Omar was then re-drawn to a general statement against slandering any groups, Israeli or Muslim or whatever.

The Party’s “anus-on-demand” function quivered on its mission and withdrew, invisibility to follow.

Washington is agog with enthusiasm on this “on-demand” feature, which can be used to more quickly cover up miscalculations that utilize party outrage and propaganda.

(The organism also impregnates and creates itself, again resembling current global politics.)

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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