Trump consulting on Dignity at The Press Conference following yesterday’s fiasco

Funny story written by joseph k winter

Thursday, 8 November 2018

image for Trump consulting on Dignity at The Press Conference following yesterday’s fiasco
Mr. Trump's finger is reported fatigued from all its hard work lately

Today President Trump has emerged several times from a private office at the White House to attend a water cooler nearby.

He then returns to this office, and sounds through the door indicate energetic discussion plus (possibly) furniture thrown.

He has summoned various parties to assist him with advice. Mr. Cruz from Texas has immediately flown up for the occasion.

Steve Bannon, Newt Gingrich, Senator Graham, are also advising the President.

Mr. Avenatti was almost called in—and may still join at some point in the spirit of “no hard feelings among politicians.”

Several dignitaries are advising via Skype.

These are Rodrigo Duterte of the Philippines, Saudi Arabia’s Mohammed bin Salman, and Italy’s Silvio Berlusconi,.

Press Secretary Sarah Sanders is reported NOT attending due to bruised knees from her attempt at a flying tackle into Mr. James Acosta, CNN reporter.

The intern who attempted to wrench the microphone out of Acosta’s grasp is also not attending, due to a twisted shoulder from the violence of her effort,

The CNN’s Acosta requested to attend but was refused, with several Security Personnel activated to make sure he could not offer further assaults on White House Grounds.

Additionally, his White House Press Conference credentials have been revoked.

Yesterday, Acosta stood clutching his microphone with both hands as the intern grimly sought to take it away from him.

“Excuse me, ma’am,” he told her, “I’m trying to ask a question.”

The question was why the caravan in Mexico has been demonized when it mainly contains desperate people such as women and children.

The President stalked to one side of the podium before returning with index finger in firing position.

“You are a rude, terrible person, and shouldn’t be working for CNN,” he said.

Mr. Trump as Expert in Rudeness is well-known.

Recently the President designated Stormy Daniels as “Horse Face,” Senator Warren as “Pocahantas,” and repeatedly lambasted Christine Ford as a liar for her testimony against Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh.

Again furniture was heard crashing, the door opened for Mr. Trump on his way to the water cooler, and a trio of voices sounded on Skype:

“Hell, I’d know what to do with them in Manila. Take along an AR-15!”

“We have extra bone saw surgeons we can send you if you need them!”

“Swivel, bend over and drop your pants! Moon ‘em!”

Later reports indicated Mr. Trump did not join general laughter in the group at this point.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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