Obama Announces Free Ice Cream for Low-Income Children

Written by Moose

Thursday, 30 April 2015

image for Obama Announces Free Ice Cream for Low-Income Children

WASHINGTON, DC - President Obama will go to one of Washington's poorest neighborhoods to talk about a plan to give low-income children free ice cream.

"If we're serious about living up to what our country is about, then we have to consider what we can do to provide free ice cream in every community" said Hugh Jorgan, Obama's top economic adviser, in a briefing with Spoof reporters.

Mr. Jorgan cited research showing 73 percent of low-income children lag below their grade level in ice cream consumption in Southeast Washington, DC.

The plan includes $128 million for expired vanilla ice cream from Blue Ball Creamery, and $362 million from Jen and Barry's for their newest flavor: Black & Brown.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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