WASHINGTON, DC - President Obama issued an executive order today, directing the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (ATF), United States Department of Agriculture (USDA) to be combined into one department.
Mr. Obama's spokesman, Tripper McGhee, stated that Genetically Modified Organisms (GMOs) and Climate Change will also be incorporated into the new, streamlined department.
The new department will be called the Bureau of Firearms, Alcohol, Tobacco, Agriculture, Substance and Science (FAT ASS).
The new department will require additional funding of $3.6 trillion start-up costs and $983 billion per year and will be paid by the wealthy.
Mr. Obama had asked the Republican-controlled congress to take up the issue, but they, AS USUAL, did nothing, forcing the president to go it alone.