LONDON - (Satire News) - Her majesty, the queen, called up her BFF, Piers Morgan and told him that she received a call from the most evil, hateful, arrogant man in the world.
"Donald Trump?" Morgan asked.
"Yes Morgy" The queen replied, "Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump - The lying, campaign-fund stealing, hooha-grabbing A-hole himself."
Queen Elizabeth told Piers that the racist, predatorial scumbag, had the unmitigated gall to ask her for a loan.
He reminded her that he has never said a cross word about her being 99½-years-old, or about being wrinkled as hell, or even the fact that she has forgotten most of the letters of the alphabet.
The queen went through the entire alphabet, and even managed to count all the way up to 483.
Trump told her that he needs $100,000 [£81,000 British] to help pay for son Barron's college tuition.
Queen Elizabeth said that currently she has all of her money tied up in a brand new product called Fog-Away, which when sprayed into a patch of fog, will eradicate the fog within 17 seconds.
