People noticed tramp during UK lockdown!

Funny story written by Jaggedone

Thursday, 16 July 2020

image for People noticed tramp during UK lockdown!
He just loves Lockdown!

Seeing is believing, and lockdown for many means seeing things that one never noticed before. Normally, crowded shopping zones are filled with trendy, swinging designer shopping bags, with the carriers hoping to be noticed by others to boost their sad egos. Lockdown meant no more trendy swingers, just an anonymous, lonely tramp or stray dog!

During lockdown, with no bags swinging, and no swingers strutting and showing off their latest Gucci, Ralph Lauren, or Louis Vuitton acquisitions, those who dared to go out and fetch their necessary requirements started to see things which they never ever bothered to see before.

Arthur Billingsgate, local tramp who resides on a park bench in Wycombe, near London, suddenly had people offering him a bob or two. Normally, ageing Arthur, would coil up in a soiled copy of the Financial Times or two, on a park bench. During lockdown, he thought, "sod it, why sleep on a park bench when there are so many empty ones in the town center, plus the fact it's much warmer there and no dogs or local hoodies peeing up my bench or on me!"

So, Arthur moved his rusty, ancient bike, loaded with his paltry belongings into the centre, and lo and behold, people actually saw him laying there, gave him a 'coffee to go' with a sweet bun, asked him how he was doing, left a can of beer, and some even dropped a fiver in his worn-out Peaky Blinders hat!

Even the Old Bill said a friendly, "hallo," and didn't book him for loitering, because there were no local yobbos or hoodies to chase, and no fancy designer bag carriers felt insulted at the tramp trespassing on their property. Arthur Billingsgate hopes lockdown will continue, because it's actually quite nice being 'seen' instead of being ignored or kicked in the head!

Every dark cloud has a silver lining. Hopefully, Arthur, and others like him, will now be seen!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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