You had all of lockdown to read me and you still have not read a page

Written by Nick Combs

Sunday, 28 June 2020

image for You had all of lockdown to read me and you still have not read a page

Location: Your Desk

Let’s be clear, it has been about four months since this whole stay at home thing started. You pulled me out of the bookshelf, placed me on the desk, and told a friend that you were finally going to read me. What happened? Never read a classic novel before? Afraid you could not handle me? That’s what it is, you cannot handle all of this. I know I am large, but it's 500+ pages of voluptuous wit and storytelling. Are you afraid of seeing what is beneath these pages? Does the thought of sitting by the fire with a chardonnay, curled up with me, slowly but eagerly turning each page to the final chapter sound boring? Fine then! Be that way! Go ahead and watch whatever is streaming right now. See if I care! Just know that I am still here, and you could have enjoyed me a long time ago.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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