Trump Asked the Queen to Help Get Some Dirt on Bernie Sanders

Written by Al N.

Tuesday, 8 October 2019

image for Trump Asked the Queen to Help Get Some Dirt on Bernie Sanders
The Queen couldn't stop laughing, especially when she read the "charisma" part.

Buckingham Palace, London In the wake of allegations that Donald Trump may have sponsored foreign states to investigate his political rival, Joe Biden, new revelations have emerged that the President approached the British Queen to "dish the dirt" on Bernie Sanders.

A recent find on Trump's "Secret Server" was a message he sent to the Queen on official White House stationery. It read:


Dear Queen,

I know you probably are a big fan of mine, because, let's face it, I've got a lot of charisma and you've had me as a guest, twice! Why, even North Korea Kim likes me! You know, both him and my pal Vlad Putin have told me I should whack some of those upstart Democrats, but I'm not going to do it. Yet.

So I wanted to ask you and Chuck, since it's pretty important to me, if you could use that Swiss Guard and Scotland Yard of yours to hook me up with some of the smack-down stuff on Bernie. Thanks, and if everything goes well, there might be some state secrets in it for you!

The Donald


Sources close to Queen Elizabeth II alleged that on receipt of the letter, Her Majesty couldn't stop laughing, especially when she read the "charisma" part.

The White House has denied the authenticity of the letter, saying that while they have several Donalds on the roll, there is no registered member on the White House staff named "The Donald".

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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