Buckingham Palace, London, UK Her Majesty the Queen has figured out that, whenever Trump is having exceptionally bad trouble at home, even worse than his usual trouble, he takes a road trip.
"Right now he's in North Korea. He'll probably want to come here soon. We've got to be ready," spoke the Queen.
Here is the new Trump visitation plan:
1. The Trump family will be housed in Hillsborough Castle in Belfast, Ireland, one of the smallest of the Queen's homes, and the one farthest away from London.
2. British food only will be served, especially Jellied Eels, Tripe, and Haggis. Each meal will have at least one of these items for a main course: Spotted Dick, Black Pudding, Pork Faggots, Flies Graveyard, or Bubble and Squeak.
3. The Gary Glitter Fan Club will babysit Barron.
4. Charles and Camilla will take the Trumps on a tour of garden clubs around England.
5. Prince Philip will be the Trumps' driver.