Written by Monkey Woods

Saturday, 1 December 2018

image for New Species Of Brown Trout Discovered In Scottish Loch
What lurks beneath these waters?

There was great excitement in Scotland earlier this afternoon, when an entirely new species of Brown Trout was discovered in Loch Laidon on Rannoch Moor on the border of Argyll and Bute, and Perthshire.

There are already four other species of brown trout in the loch, but this one was different.

Profundal Benthivore, already nicknamed the 'Dirty Brown Trout' was found by two fisherman during a session spent at the picturesque location.

One, Willie Strachan, 45, was called to the scene by his pal, Jock McShame, who had just gone off for a few minutes on 'some other business'.

Said an excited Willie:

"Aye, Jockie called me over, an' said 'Take a look at this bastard!' He was right! Av nivver seen such a big trout as this - it was huge!"

The pair witnessed the spectacle for only a few vital seconds before the creature sank out of sight into the murky depths of the loch.

McShame told our fishing correspondent, Paxton Quigley:

"Ah felt much better afterwards!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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