Cabinet members were called in this afternoon to sign off Theresa Maybot's Brexit deal but all was not well as it was condensed into a two line SMS or "text message" as Britons like to call it. "Ministers" were shocked by the paucity of information made available to them.
Olly Robbins, the top UK official at the Brexit talks came out to speak to the assembled alcohol sodden Downing Street press corps:
"The meeting will discuss the final text of the Brexit deal agreed today with European Union negotiators. This bunch of simpletons couldn't run a whelk stall as we all know, let alone understand the full withdrawal agreement, which runs to more than 400 pages of dense legal wording. A two line text message is just about all their collective brain cell can take in."
This is merely the first step in the long process of ratifying the UK’s withdrawal from the EU which probably won't happen.
It wasn't long before the final text was leaked "We R off, so there. Pls B nice 2 us."