For those of us basking in the recent heatwave taking care with the sun cream, there are others who are not being so careful and are risking serious heatstroke.
The NHS has reported a massive increase in people who believe that England have just won on penalties and reached the quarter finals of the World Cup.
This sad fantasy is being celebrated up and down the country with people out on the streets singing "Eng-er-land" and "Its coming home" at 3am in the morning.
Sadly, hospital wards are filling up with these delusional victims of heatstroke to such an extent that the government has declared a mass hallucination alert.
If you are reading this and are exhibiting any of these symptoms please call your nearest emergency Helpline.
If you live in Wiltshire and are having delusional symptoms or paralysis please call The Ministry Of Defence instead.
