Following a Rush of Wind, causing a great stink in the Parliamentary Chamber, an embarrassed Tory Government has issued pegs to all members attending debates.
Some MP's complained that 'The Ruddy Rush of Wind' was coming from the posterior of the Home Secretary Amber Rudd - who was farting uncontrollably throughout her speech defending the Government's record on implenting the well known Enoch Doctrine.
Prime Minister Therese May, however, upstaged the Opposition by declaring that they had been the first ones to fart.
'It your fault' she said pointing at Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn 'Labour began farting in the Chamber before us'.
The media was in ecstasy at this massive blow to Corbyn - the position had become clear. Hostility to immigrants had begun under Labour and was then the fault of civil servants. The Government was not responsible for the Ruddy Rush of Wind.
