New UK Foreign Secretary, still-buffoon, ex mayor of London, and general circus clown, Bo Jo, has made his first appearance alongside US Secretary of State, John Kerry, ex-actor in the Addams Family, and now bearing a grey haired wig over his neck bolts.
It was the perfect opportunity for Boris to right a few wrongs (in his opinion), crawl up the US's backside and prove to the world that hanging around on lifts waving Union Jack mini-flags means much more than the world thinks.
He has refuted ever insulting anybody from the US government and here are his explanations re a few past outlandish statements in the direction of his US cousins:
"Hilary Clinton is a Satanic Bitch!" Bo Jo explains, "I never meant that, I actually meant Hilary has one hell of a clit!"
"President Obama is an asshole kissing nitwit!" Bo Jo explains, "I actually meant that President Obama is a Figure Head for all black people in the US and Trump is a Nazi!"
"I back-stabbed Cameron with impunity and laughed all the way to the boozer with Nigel Baby!" Bo Jo explains, "No this is just not true and the NHS can lick my butt too because I am a rich, privately insured snob, and the NHS is much better off when all of us rich lads bugger off including my dear friend, Cameron!"
As one can see a high-ranking position in global politics can alter the meaning of much gobbledygook spewing out of politicians filthy mouths and Bo Jo is doing a great job already!
The UK is now a much better place and can be assured of one thing, their main foreign policy, licking the US's butt, will continue as long as back-stabbing Bo Jo is in charge!