According to various reports, Liverpool are set to sign David Beckham, Christiano Ronaldo, Samuel Eto'o, Daniel Alves, Carlos Tevez and a host of other players in what can only be described as bad journalism.
Liverpool are also set to create a new management structure which will see Rafa Benitez working side by side with Jose Mourinho and Alex Ferguson.
Perhaps most incredible, an unlikely buyout is also on the cards. Despite the recent acquisition of Liverpool by Americans, Gillett and Hicks, Liverpool FC is about to be sold to ... the World Bank!
With most of the world's wealth at their disposal, the new management team hope to build robots which will replace all of the human players.
You'll never walk alone... without the aid of microprocessors.