MAR-a-LAGO, Florida – (Satire News) – The latest claim emanating from the mysteriously misogynistic mind of the former White House occupant states that he is now being singled out and targeted by space aliens because of his wealth, health, and high IQ.
The Daily Divulger has learned of the former “Golfer-in-Chief’s” latest fantasy illusion from a source very close to him, Donnie Jr’s, long-legged and long-winded main squeeze, Kimberly Guilfoyle.
Guilfoyle agreed to meet with DD reporter Sonora Durango in the parking lot of The Crocked Crocodile Lounge in downtown Palm Beach.
The news media has known for a long time that Miss Kimmy, as Ivanka calls her, really and truly had her sights set on Donald Johnny, but when Melania found out she threatened to do things to the Sofia Vergara-wannabe, that even the Taliban doesn't have listed in The Official Taliban Book of Terror and Torture.
Meanwhile DJT confided to his alleged boyfriend, Sean Hannity, that he is seriously considering Marjorie Taylor Greene to be his 2024 running mate.