Donald Trump Says That He Kicked Ass In The GOP New Hampshire Primary
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Donald Trump was smiling like the Shetland pony that ate the canary. He had just won the New Hampshire Primary without ever setting foot in the Mushroom Pizza State. He captured 91% of the vote. “Hey losers!” He yelled from the...Read full story
Michelle Obama's Birth Certificate Is Missing
WASHINGTON, D.C. - First Lady Michelle Obama has reportedly informed Speaker of The House Nancy Pelosi that her birth certificate appears to be missing. Mrs. Obama said that she recently went to look for her birth certificate when daughter Malia s...Read full story
Obama Shocker: I did not have sex with that Ballet Dancer, Rahm Emanuel!"
A newly repentant President Barry Obama, having 'come to Jesus' a few hours ago, was forced to clarify his relationship with soon to be departed House Senior Advisor Rahm Emanuel, a former Ballet Dancer saying, "I did not have sex with that man!"...Read full story
A White House Source Says Michelle Obama Dislikes Helle Thorning-Schmidt Even More Than Hillary Clinton Disliked Monica Lewinsky
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The White House staff has all been told by White House Press Secretary Cal Colfax not to mention the name of the Danish prime minister in the presence of the first lady, Michelle Obama. Colfax stated that Mrs. Obama sees red whe...Read full story
Michelle Obama's Mother Finds Secret UFO Files In Obama's Desk
Marian Robinson who's the mother of Michelle Obama and who lives with the first family at the White House has made an interesting discovery. This was sold to us by a member of the White House staff, after overhearing Mrs. Robinson relate her amazi...Read full story
Obama Suffering Midlife Crisis
Chicago, IL - Former President Barack Obama doesn't know what to do with himself these days. After months of travel and adventure camps, Obama remains without a job or sense of purpose. "Time of my life!" wrote Obama in a recent tweet which was qu...Read full story
Trump vows to undo Michelle Obama's policies to "Make America Eat Again"
Through the majority of his campaign, Donald Trump fired up much his supporters with vows to undo many of defining policies of President Obama's administration, policies such as Obamacare, international agreements, & not jailing Hillary Clinton.Read full story
Michelle Obama Will Turn 50 Soon & Not Pleased!
First lady Michelle Obama will be the guest of honor at a White House dance party next month when she turns "50 and fabulous" but looks more like "50 and frustrated". She's still not all that happy about the Prime Minister of Denmark flirting with...Read full story
Kirstie Alley Addresses Chelsea Handler's Cupcake Addiction Comment
LOS ANGELES - Kirstie Alley has made it very clear that she cannot stand that skanky dishwater blonde talk show host Chelsea Handler. Alley recently appeared on The Viagra View and told Larry King that Handler is without a doubt the most evil, hat...Read full story
Michelle Obama Not Pregnant! President Disappointed!
"I wish it were true", the President told ABC and other networks this morning "but it is not true, no matter how many tabloids you read." First Lady Michelle Obama admits that she is not pregnant according to a Source at the White House. "The stor...Read full story
Steve Harvey calls Obama mediocre negro for living with a transvestite
Hollywood, CA - On Monday's Family Feud show, when the question "what would you say to a man who lives with a transvestite?" came up, Steve Harvey went ballistic when none of the contestants could come up with any responses; all they did was blush an...Read full story
Alaska Admits It Has Developed An Atomic Bomb
JUNEAU, Alaska - After months of diligent research The Amalgamated Department of Data Gathering, which is based in Chicago, is reporting some astounding news. According to ADDG representative Bagby B. Buckleybox his agency has learned that the sta...Read full story
Alex Jones: Michelle Obama Time Traveled To Copy Melania Trump's Speech
Alex Jones, purveyor of crackpot conspiracy theories, is now saying that Melania Trump's RNC convention speech is proof that the Obama's have access to Hillary and Bill Clinton's time machine. Wait--what the hell? Yes, Alex Jones is pushing the...Read full story
President Obama Makes An NBA Bet With Jack Nicholson
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Jack Nicholson recently won a $100,000 bet when the Los Angeles Lakers managed to somehow limp into the NBA Western Conference playoffs. And now the star of Easy Rider, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, A Few Good Men and Oops...Read full story
President Obama Says Shame On The Producers of Dancing With The Stars For Allowing 77-Year-Old Billy Dee Williams To Appear On The Show
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama and the first lady both watched season 18's opening show of Dancing With The Stars. Afterwards the first couple spoke with Ling Chow Rangoon of iRumors in the White House Oval Office. The president said that h...Read full story
Paul McCartney Says 'Michelle' Was Written For Michelle Obama
New Yawk, NY-- Sir Paul McCartney said today the famous Beatle's song, 'Michelle', was written for Michelle Obama. The ex-Beatle was in New Yawk today for treatment on his marijuana addiction. Sir Paul says he smokes "about 20 joints a day, or maybe...Read full story
Fashion Designer reveals Oprah and Michelle Obama unknowingly choose identical gowns for Barack's swearing-in ceremony! Seamstress arrested for selling design to Wallmart!
A fashion designer has revealed that Oprah Winfrey and Michelle Obama have both chosen identical gowns for Barack's Presidential swearing in ceremony. "Of course they were unaware that they had both chosen the same style complete with matching ti...Read full story
McDonald's to Offer a "Loaves and Fishes" Special
McDonald's executives went into action as soon they read the story (see it here) on the announcement by archaeologists that they may have found in Israel the original site of the "loaves and fishes" miracle. (You'll recall the Bible story that thous...Read full story
President in Hawaii Surprised By Many Gifts From Target Sent to Family There
"This is remarkable", stated Michelle Obama and her daughters agreed. "I guess the American people appreciate us after all." The First Lady was talking about all the great gifts, over 4000 at the last count, they have received from ordinary citize...Read full story
Obama's State of the Union Speech: Secret Access to What's EXCLUDED
If you think that the U. S. President writes his own State of the Union speech each year, think again. Dozens of speechwriters have been toiling away for weeks at the White House, writing the phrases that will emerge from the Chief Executive's m...Read full story