Michelle Obama's Birth Certificate Is Missing
WASHINGTON, D.C. - First Lady Michelle Obama has reportedly informed Speaker of The House Nancy Pelosi that her birth certificate appears to be missing. Mrs. Obama said that she recently went to look for her birth certificate when daughter Malia s...Read full story
Obamas to Whitewash White House with Anal Bleach
Sphincter, Ohio - After their recent tour of the White House with George and Laura Bush, Barack and Michelle Obama have decided to whitewash the White House with anal bleach before they take occupancy. "Out with the old, in with the new," said Michelle. "After eight years, that white trash has really trashed the place, top to bottom." "The exterior hasn't looked this bad since the British tr...Read full story
Michelle Obama Pregnant
Stork's Landing, Illinois - It was smiles all around at the Obama house as First Mama, Michelle Obama, announced she is pregnant. The wife of President-elect Barack Obama broke the news at an impromptu press conference earlier today. "Yes, it's tr...Read full story
Michelle Obama Jealous of Joe Biden's Man Boobs
United States First Lady Michelle Obama admits that she is jealous of Vice President Joe Biden and his man boobs. She said in confidence to a White House staffer that "I really ought to have the biggest tits and be the biggest boob in the White Hous...Read full story
Michelle Obama calls in White House ghostbusters at phantom pregnancy reports
Washington - Someone who should know better has ghost-written a baby according to a pre-Halloween sweep of the White House septic tank. Spooky pest control operatives hired by the First Lady found half a dozen piss test swabs following a plumbing...Read full story
First Lady Michelle Obama's ongoing food fight to rid American schools of "racist menus"
COMING SOON TO A SCHOOL NEAR YOU - Michelle Obama has banished the pink cookie beloved by millions of red-blooded Americans. According to the First Lady, "the dessert have too many calorie" for children, or, for that matter, the president himself...Read full story
Michelle Obama goes commando in latest anti-dandruff therapy craze
Washington AC/DC - It's every woman's nightmare when aerating the family jewels in a Sharon Stone-esque outfit and not much more besides. This morning it was the turn of First Lady to discover the amazing reflective properties of her glossy leath...Read full story
Democrats Urge Obama to Deliver Bigger Stimulus Package
Democrats are urging that the President send every American family $1,000 in another effort to stimulate the economy. "The $250 we sent out before wasn't enough to get people spending once again", stated Barney Frank. "Now Americans are beginning...Read full story
Rush Limbaugh Angry Over First Lady's Rib Dinner
During his daily radio broadcast Monday, Rush Limbaugh couldn't resist aiming his vitriol toward the First Lady, calling her a hypocrite for dining on a sumptuous short rib dinner while, says Limbaugh "she's making the rest of the country exist on nu...Read full story
EXCLUSIVE! Top Five Things Barack Obama Misses about Being President
These days, the world's eyes are on United States President Donald Trump, whose social media antics and shameless shenanigans have captured the hearts and minds of weirdos the world over. But in this exclusive interview, we sat down with former presi...Read full story
ObamaNomics: US Agriculture Growing - Michelle Increases Size of Garden 50%!
Despite falling poll numbers and the rise of unemployment and corresponding dissent in the US, President Barry Obama pointed with pride to Michelle's new garden as a sign that the US economy was 'back' and adding hundreds of more 'green jobs!" Ju...Read full story
Michelle Obama is Spock's sister
Star Trek fans are reeling from the revelation that Michelle Obama is actually Spock's sister. Trekkies were amazed to see Michelle Obama wearing a Romulan costume at the presidential inauguration. The First Lady was wearing a costume which was ide...Read full story
Michelle to Dump Bam; Marry Harry
In a story having grave implications for the traditional special bonds that unite the UK and the USA, Michelle Obama is reported to have kicked over the traces and become a cougar. With her sites on Prince Harry, the first lady has gleefully dumpe...Read full story
Obamas Set to Air Marriage Woes on Dueling TV: The View vs Oprah Tell All Show Down!
Now that the cat is out of the bag concerning the fact that the Obama marriage is in serious trouble with Michelle petulantly flying off to Spain to pointedly snub her husband's Birthday, it now appears the Feuding First Couple will go public in sepa...Read full story
Michelle Obama's Inaugural Gown Revealed!
The secret is finally out - Michelle Obama has picked a virtually unknown Chicago-based designer to fashion her inaugural gown. Details of the gown have just been leaked by E!. Designer Cécelia Hendrickson has fashioned the floor-length, A-lin...Read full story
Michelle Obama Loses It Over Not Being Invited to British Royal Wedding
First Lady Michelle Obama did a Hyacinth Bucket routine when she discovered that she and her husband, Barack, were not invited to the royal wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton. "She blew her stack alright", stated a White House page. "Yo...Read full story
Michelle Obama Admits Blow Up Doll Of Obama Better Than Obama!
Poor President Obama. First the Republicans kick most of his fellow Democrats out of office and replace them. Now Michelle has bought an Obama blow-up doll from China to keep her company while he is on the road. "She won't quit talking about the (...Read full story
Obama will 'Trick or Treat' dressed as Romney dressed as a clown
WASHINGTON DC (ABSNN) - President Barack Obama revealed his Halloween costume at a Washington DC gala today. The chief executive of the United States entered the White House Press Room dressed as Mitt Romney, dressed as a clown. His costume shocked...Read full story
Obama's State of the Union Speech: Secret Access to What's EXCLUDED
If you think that the U. S. President writes his own State of the Union speech each year, think again. Dozens of speechwriters have been toiling away for weeks at the White House, writing the phrases that will emerge from the Chief Executive's m...Read full story
Obama and Berlusconi Close to Blockbuster Trade: Madoff & Lohan for Amanda Knox!
With everything up for sale, trade or barter, US President Barack Obama has said to have floated yet another human trafficking scheme, this time to Italy's beleaguered president Silvio Berlusconi. Following the hush-hush hurry up deal to get Anna...Read full story