Oxford, Webster, Macmillan, Herbie’s Big Book of Big Words … what do they all have in common? They’re all dictionaries. They keep track of all the words you use or haven’t used yet by will some day.
And there’s another common factor among them all: they hate the letter Q.
“Death to the Q!” some dictionary editors have been saying as they protest in the streets before cops turn their water cannons on those confused college professors.
Not the most popular letter in the alphabet, but not the least either, Q has a rocky life. It’s in hundreds, maybe thousands of words, and JK Rowling and her “Quidditch” horseshit ain’t helping! Stop making up new words and sticking Qs in them, writers of the world!
Q will soon be removed from all dictionaries and all words that use it, replaced with others that may make the same or similar sound, like a K or a “Kw” combo. 26 letters in the English language? We can all do our part to cut that number down. The fewer letters means fewer words which means fewer ways of thinking.
Support your local dictionary. Cut out the Q! Make it anonymous and invisible, and do your part to stop talking.
Cuz talking leads to protesting and shouting hateful slogans against corrupt governments – and then the water cannons start spraying.
