The Real Story Behind Space Force

Funny story written by Stefano M. Stefano

Saturday, 19 December 2020

image for The Real Story Behind Space Force

It's been over a year since the orange-skinned President Trump touted the formation of something called 'Space Force', but there hasn't been much media coverage about it after the big annoucement, other than the flag cost American tax payers an estimated $55 million to design and create for the self-congratulatory press conference.

A recently released secret tape recording from the initial meeting reveals the difficulties in the creation of the mysteriously ethereal and (so far) invisible...(cue dramatic 'Also sprach Zarathustra', a.k.a. the iconic theme of '2001: A Space Odyssey')...Spaaace Forrrrce!

Trump; "...and the other guy says, "But, Bernie! I need two sheeps! That's funny right? That's the most tremendous joke you ever heard, right?"

1st Advisor; "Hilarious, sir! Very witty! Haha!"

2nd Advisor; "It's so funny, Mr. President! I can't laugh right now, thanks to my botox, but that's a real knee slapper!"

3rd Advisor; "I think Pope Francis will laugh his beany off when you meet him next month at the Vatican, sir!"

Trump: "So, let's move on to my latest and greatest creation, something I like to call 'Space Force'! 'Space Force'!"

1st Advisor; "Sorry, what, sir?"

2nd Advisor; "Do you mean 'NASA', sir? That already exists."

Trump; "No, I mean Space Force."

2nd Advisor; "Oh, do you mean the European Space Agency?"

3rd Advisor; "No, he means the Russian space program-- Roscosmos!"

Trump; "I'm not talking about those guys, I'm talking about our own people!"

1st Advisor; "You mean like that thing in 'Star Trek'? That's called 'Starfleet', not Space Force', Mr. Trump."

Trump; "No, I--"

2nd Advisor; "Oh, I know! He means 'International Rescue'!"

3rd Advisor; "I think he means 'S.H.A.D.O.'!"

Trump; "Listen to me, I mean--"

1st Advisor;"No, no, he's talking about 'S.H.I.E.L.D.'"

Trump; "Our guys! OKAY?! Our guys! Our guys will be in space--"

1st Advisor; "The Colonial Warriors? Are we gonna build a battlestar, sir?"

Trump; "A what-star?! Nonononono! I'm saying--"

2nd Advisor; "Do you mean 'Rogue Squadron', sir?"

Trump; "It's us! Not them! It's Space Force! The good guys! We're the good guys in space!"

3rd Advisor; "I'm confused. Is he talking about 'The Super Friends'?

Trump: "AAAARRRGGGHH You're all fired! Get out! Get outta here! Especially you! You're ugly!"

1st Advisor; "I told you the botox wasn't working!"

3rd Advisor; "Why does he wanto call it 'Space Force'? That sounds like something from the 1950's before they even built rockets!"

Let's just be glad Trump had nothing to do with Starfleet-- Captain Kirk would be riding a desk on Mother Earth, instead of the United Space Force Space Ship Trumpterprise!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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