WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News)- In a move that stunned even Trump sidekick, Lindsey Graham, the soon-to-be-not-president has fired his attorney general.
GOPickly magazine is reporting that William Barr, (aka Chubby), who, for months and months, forgot that he was the attorney for the American citizens, and not Trump’s personal attorney, said he had become a big damn ball of stress.
Vox Populi is reporting that Barr had refused to go along with the asshole’s idea of pardoning close to 10,000 of his family members, staff members, friends, and anyone who would pay the $100,000 pardoning fee.
According to an inside source, Trump has a list that includes 9,903 names of people he is going to pardon, which will net him $9.9 billion.
Barr said that he had not slept more than 2 hours and 15 minutes in months. He added that he has already booked therapy sessions for the next 8 Thursdays.
His wife even told CNN’s Anderson Cooper that Billy is having a hell of a time getting it up.
Reports coming from within the White House say that POTUS plans to name his son, Eric, as the new attorney general, circumventing the Assistant Attorney General Alexander Acosta.
