1970s TV That Everyone Loves But Can't Remember

Written by Doubting Thomas

Saturday, 14 September 2019

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If you remember these, you weren't doing enough drugs

OK, another pointless clickbait list.

Please join me in rushing home from school to watch one of these classics of British TV back when it was just mediocre, as opposed to unwatchable garbage:

1. The Persuaders

Tony Curtis and Roger Moore tour the Mediterranean in big, fast cars, groping women in bikinis. Nobody can quite remember what this show was about, as most people thought the star of the show was Moore's Aston Martin.

2. The Protectors

Featured a good cast of Robert Vaughn, Nyree Dawn Porter and Tony Anholt ( who later appeared in Space 1999). Another one where nobody can remember what it was about except for the rocking theme tune by Tony Christie, which is still a karaoke favorite.

3. The Zoo Gang

Get some fantastic character actors such as John Mills, Brian Keith and Barry Morse together, and it's a hit, right? Wrong. All anyone can remember about this, is a bunch of old alcoholics touring Europe, punching brown people and killing Nazis. Nope, I've no clue, either.

4. Sapphire & Steel

One for the youngsters, as anyone who can remember this, wasn't doing enough drugs back then. Whoever came up with the opening commentary had never seen the periodic table, but it seemed to involve Joanna Lumley and David Macallum touring the universe (OK, southern England) fighting something called "Time".

5 UFO

A Gerry Anderson live action series that only ran to two seasons. Involved some sort of alien invasion, but did have excellent model effects. Bring back the purple wigs and silver miniskirts from the moonbase. They used to make me feel a bit funny.

And finally.....

This one's going to be controversial:

Love Thy Neighbour

Anyone who has bothered to actually watch this might realise that it doesn't deserve the hatred or claims of racism leveled against it. The wives were utterly sensible and grown up, whereas the two main protagonists, excellently played by Jack Smethurst and Rudolph Walker, were both utter dickheads, not just to each other, but all around them. A bit like Gammons and Remoaners are today....

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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