Brian Asshat and his good friend (and paid housekeeper) Felicity Dowager from Chutney on the Fritz have started to watch all five series of Poldark, again.
Felicity said 'I watch it for Captain Ross, his hairy chest, his way with a scythe, his way with the ladies, and his moody staring across the sea, whilst riding a small black horse.'
Brian sat there, watching.
'Of course, I don't know what Brian watches it for. I think it is so that he can compare his life to that of the evil, wealthy, successful genius that George Warleggen is. The only problem is, that all Brian is, George isn't. I think that the only thing that Brian and George have in common are bitter memories of their school days'.