Brangelina files lawsuit against Tiger hooker Loredana Jolie

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 15 December 2009

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Unbridled lust and gratuitous golf. Jeez.

Orlando, Fla - (Reuterus): "A gratuitous abuse of the Jolie surname," attorney-at-law Sharke E Blinkenshyster commented today.

"Ms Loredana Jolie - that's French for 'pretty' - has dragged my clients' name into a sordid circus of spiralling marital infidelity, prostitution and pornographic videos.

"And acquired by stealth internet search engine topspots reserved for the global Brangelina brand."

Documents filed before a Florida court allege the wholesome, family-oriented Jolie surname is a global benchmark for matrimonial probity.

"It's been dragged into the squalid domain of unbridled lust and gratuitous golf.

"Decent Americans are seething at the outrage."

Not everybody is happy at the lawsuit allegations, however.

An LA FagHagSlagMag editorial commented today that a public examination of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's private life might indeed compare quite favorably with Loredana Joile's.

"Protecting the Brangelina brand could mean the public stripping of a meticulous construct.

"In financial terms we're talking $$$s."

A spokesman for Loredana Jolie said today: "WTF?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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