NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - Melania Trump, the soon-to-be-third ex-wife of the meanest, most hateful, asshole in the entire universe (Trump) recently sat down with Anderson Cooper for a one-on-one interview.
Anderson asked the former first lady, who after being in the United States still has a horrendously horrible Slovenian accent, how she is doing, now that she has left the Trumptard.
Melly replied "To tell youse dee trooth Coopy, I feels like $3 billion."
She smiled and added that she will be taking the Orange Blimp (Donaldo) to the damn 'fooking' cleaners.
Anderson then asked her about the rumor regarding Summer's Eve feminine douche.
The Slovenian beauty replied that her racist husband gargles with the female hygiene product on a daily basis.
Cooper then asked her about her new love interest, L.A. Lakers super star LeBron James.
Mrs. Trump smiled, turned red and remarked "Bronny, he makes me too feel like I am a 19-jear-old sexy, horny, lasceevius beach in da heat, if ju know what I means."
"Gotcha sweetie."
