HOLLYWOOD - (Satire News) - The National Rumblings News Agency has just reported that America's "Power Couple," Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck have just donated $1.7 to the Ukrainian war effort.
NRNA writer Traci Diddle stated that J.Lo also donated several personal, intimate lingerie items to be auctioned off to the highest bidders, and every nickel will be sent to the Ukrainian government to purchase much-needed food, water, medicine, bullets, grenade launchers, nail clippers, condoms, and soccer balls for the citizenry.
Miss Diddle revealed that J.Lo told her that some of the donated intimate items include a dozen string bikini thong panties, three very skimpy bikini swimsuits, two animal print teddies, two shocking pink baby doll gowns, and two boxes of Sleeping Beauty brand pantiliners.
Diddle noted that Afleck donated one of his childhood hula hoops, a set of Lee Trevino golf clubs, a Jose Altuve baseball glove, an acoustic guitar that was autographed by Willie Nelson, and a pair of his red, white, and blue boxer shorts.
SIDENOTE: Miss Diddle added that the happy couple known as "Bennifer," could become husband and wife by June 13, of this year.
