NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - If anyone had any doubt that the Russian soldiers are fucked up - that doubt has now gone out the damn window.
The Ipso Facto News Agency has just reported that Putin's troops have just voted to make Cong. Marjorie Taylor Greene as the official pin-up girl of the Russian army.
When MTG was told of the honor she reportedly puckered up her lips and said that she loves the Ruskies more than she ever loved Matt Gaetz, Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump, or that rodent-faced Fox News puppet Greg Gutfeld.
Meanwhile, word coming form the Ukraine is that their soldiers have named the Colombian firecracker Sofia Vergara as their pin-up girl.
One Ukrainian general stated that Sofia is an 11, whereas, Marjorie is a fucking 3.
When Sofia was told of the honor she replied that she is going to send every Ukrainian soldier a nude autographed photo of herself frolicking in her birthday suit at the La Brea Tar Pits.