HOLLYWOOD – (Satire News) – The TV comedy series “Gilligan’s Island” was one of America’s most popular television shows, and it was on the air between 1964 and 1967.
The sit-com was literally a paradise (no pun intended-well maybe) because of the sensational display of T&A* that was provided in each episode by the movie star Ginger and the girl-next-door Mary Ann.
Mary Ann pranced around in Daisy Duke short shorts before they were even called Daisy Duke short shorts, while each week Ginger wore glamorous outfits from famous designers such as Donatella Versace, Yves Saint Laurent, Coco Chanel, Christian Dior, and Repunsel Von Lawn.
Meanwhile the Howells, Thurston the III, and Lovey wondered about the stock market and how their stocks were doing.
The professor was constantly dreaming of ways to build a radio, while Gilligan spent lots of his time in a continuous state of erectile woodyness fantasizing about the erotically sensuous Ginger and Mary Ann.
LaLaLand Daily reporter Macadamia Honeysuckle recently did a story on the entire cast. She noted that the actor who portrayed the skipper (Alan Hale, Jr.) ended up opening up a chain of Gilligan’s Island Lobster, Shrimp, and Jellyfish Restaurants throughout America.
But she pointed out that the two age old questions, even after 55 years is still “Ginger or Mary Ann?” and “What the hell was Gilligan’s first name?”
The first question, which was very popular with college males, was simply a matter of lascivious preference, while the second question was finally answered by one of Bob Denver’s great-granddaughters, Valerie Denver.
Valerie revealed that her great-grandfather had mentioned to her on her 18th birthday that Gilligan was actually the character's first name and his last name, which was never mentioned, for the obvious reason, was Hitler.
* [EDITOR’S NOTE: T&A stands for Tits and Ass].