AVOCADO HEIGHTS, California – (Satire News) – Weather experts are now stating that the California wildfires are the worst in the history of wildfires.
Papayo Bamboo with Tabloid Today, said that she spoke with Max D. Nissbaum, who is the director of the Left Coast Meteorological Council and he informed her that they now have over 804,000 firefighters fighting 172 wildfires within the state.
Nissbaum, who proudly said that he has just been cleared of the arson charges, remarked that the dreaded Satan River fire has burned over 146,000 acres, along with hundreds of buildings, houses, swimming pools, and at least 60 Vietnamese nail salons.
Meanwhile, VP Harris, a native of San Francisco, says that she will be signing her second VP Executive Order which will take $87 million from Trump’s Federal Campaign Fund and deposit it into the California Council For Wildfire Fighting (CCFWF).
Tabloid Today is reporting that if the fires are not controlled, and soon, half of California could be in ashes by Christmas time.
In a Related Story: California forest rangers report finding lots of woodpeckers with black peckers from pecking on burned out trees.