Massachusetts Censors The Phrase “Pussy Whipped”

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Saturday, 14 August 2021

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The vote to ban the phrase "Pussy Whipped" passed in the Massachusetts Senate by a vote of 57 to 43.

BOSTON – (Satire News) – The Massachusetts Senate has voted to ban a phrase that many consider to be inappropriate and a bit risqué.

State Senator Hirkey L. Stonewire, said that he has been trying to outlaw that horribly horrendous phrase for the past 14 years.

He said that it has special meaning for him since many of his family members, including his maternal grandmother and two aunts used to refer to his paternal grandfather, Josiah, as being “Pussy Whipped.”

The senator remarked that one Thanksgiving, after his Aunt Rita called Josiah by the PW name, he got so upset that he picked up a turkey leg and he tossed it at Rita, who ducked causing the wayward turkey leg to hit her sister-in-law Stefana.

Stefana got so mad at Rita for ducking that she took a bowl of cranberry sauce and emptied on Rita's crotch region.

Someone called 911 and when the police arrived, everyone had left except for Uncle Silas, who has to use a walker to get around; and as luck would have it, cousin Bobby Joe, the family’s practical joker had hid it in the broom closet.

In Other News: Mitch McConnell says that the rumors of him having undescended balls are just not true.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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