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Funny satire stories about Thanksgiving

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Funny story: Buffalo Bills Fan Creamed His Underpants After Latest Win

Buffalo Bills Fan Creamed His Underpants After Latest Win

The AFC East may well be won by the New England Patriots (10-1) come January, but their closest rivals, the Buffalo Bills, (8-3), are giving them a real run for their money, and one Bills fan was so elated after his team's latest victory, he literall...

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Funny story: Thanks To Be Given For Thanksgiving

Thanks To Be Given For Thanksgiving

News has just reached us that, later today, Thursday 28 November, thanks are to be given for Thanksgiving. When everyone has woken up and gotten out of bed, that is. That's nothing unusual, of course. Thanksgiving, the one day in the year wi...

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Funny story: Black Friday Is On A Friday Again

Black Friday Is On A Friday Again

Black Friday, the one day in the calendar year that can be relied upon to send all obsessive shoppers into a frenzy, can also be counted on in another way - it's always on a Friday! Held on the very next day after Thanksgiving, Black Friday can al...

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Funny story: Nashville Woman Prays Over Thanksgiving Turkey and Reflects that Karma’s a Bitch

Nashville Woman Prays Over Thanksgiving Turkey and Reflects that Karma’s a Bitch

In gratitude for the Thanksgiving Day feast prepared by her mother and extended family, Carrie Grace Martin of Nashville, Tennessee, bowed her head in prayer, thanked the centerpiece stuffed turkey for his/her sacrifice, and reflected to herself that...

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Funny story: Thanksgiving Day - But When?

Thanksgiving Day - But When?

Thanksgiving Day, that special day of the year, set aside to celebrate and give thanks for the harvest and all things Natural - but when is it? "Why, it's the fourth Thursday in November!" all Americans will be screaming - but it's not as simple a...

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Funny story: Tiger Woods And Phil Mickelson To Dine Together On Thanksgiving

Tiger Woods And Phil Mickelson To Dine Together On Thanksgiving

Tiger Woods and 'Big' Phil Mickelson are to put their golfing differences on hold, and will spend Thanksgiving together next Thursday, during a televised 'intimate dinner for two'. The pair, who, on Friday, 23 November, will tee off in the eagerly...

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Funny story: President Trump To Make Alterations To Thanksgiving Holiday

President Trump To Make Alterations To Thanksgiving Holiday

When President Trump told fellow Republicans today, that he intended to make changes to the Thanksgiving holiday, there was a hushed silence, as everyone in the room listened carefully for the date change. They needn't have worried, however, for t...

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Funny story: Thanksgiving was "Native Americans being sarcastic"

Thanksgiving was "Native Americans being sarcastic"

Historians have long believed that Thanksgiving was either a genuine attempt to smooth over relations between early US settlers and the native Americans; or else a lie told by the settlers after they had massacred them all. However, Professor of H...

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Funny story: Thousands of Service Personel seek Trauma counseling after Trump.com™ Thanksgiving Speech for the Troops

Thousands of Service Personel seek Trauma counseling after Trump.com™ Thanksgiving Speech for the Troops

Medical Doctors are reporting a huge upsurge in active service personnel seeking psychological treatment for PTSSD (Post Trump Speech Stress Disorder) after Trump.com™ Thanksgiving Speech for the Troops. Doctors say they have not seen a sur...

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Funny story: Turkey Pardons Donald Trump At Thanksgiving.

Turkey Pardons Donald Trump At Thanksgiving.

In an unusual turnaround at the annual Turkey Pardoning festivity at the White House the turkey itself made a speech. The 48 pound white turkey Drumstick unexpectedly hopped up to the mike, cleared his throat and said "Thank you, Mr. President fo...

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Funny story: President Forgets To Pardon 51,649,998 Turkeys

President Forgets To Pardon 51,649,998 Turkeys

WASHINGTON, Nov. 22 -- In a joke-filled pre-Thanksgiving ceremony at the White House yesterday afternoon, President Trump continued a much-beloved American tradition and forgot to pardon approximately 51,649,998 turkeys. While USA Today estimates...

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Funny story: "Mmm, Tofurky!" Pleads Desperate Turkey in Final Week Before Thanksgiving

"Mmm, Tofurky!" Pleads Desperate Turkey in Final Week Before Thanksgiving

Clearly feeling the heat as he approached his looming slaughter at the age of six weeks, a bloated five-week-old teenage turkey desperately attempted to talk up the appeal of "mock meats" like the widely popular soy-based Tofurky. "Mmmm, Tofurky!"...

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Funny story: "Mmmm, Tofurky!' Pleads Desperate Turkey in Final Week before Thanksgiving

"Mmmm, Tofurky!' Pleads Desperate Turkey in Final Week before Thanksgiving

Clearly feeling the heat as he approached his looming slaughter at the age of six weeks, a bloated five-week-old teenage turkey desperately attempted to talk up the appeal of "mock meats" like the widely popular soy-based Tofurky. "Mmmm, Tofurky!"...

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Funny story: A Thanksgiving Editorial: In Praise of the Common Turkey

A Thanksgiving Editorial: In Praise of the Common Turkey

As just about all educated people know, turkeys are among the smartest animals on the planet, perhaps in the galaxy. If they were mammals instead of birds, they would, in fact, be the smartest animals on the planet. (For some reason, known only to theoretical physicists, bird neural DNA seems to suffer from "leakage," also known as accelerated entropic seasoning syndrome. Because this is a hig...

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Funny story: President Forgets To Pardon 45,999,998 Turkeys

President Forgets To Pardon 45,999,998 Turkeys

WASHINGTON, Nov. 24 -- In a joke-filled pre-Thanksgiving ceremony at the White House yesterday afternoon, President Obama continued a much-beloved American tradition and forgot to pardon approximately 45,999,998 turkeys. Tater and Tot, two turkeys...

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Funny story: Abe the turkey rejects Obama's pardon

Abe the turkey rejects Obama's pardon

Abe the Turkey, has rejected the president's yearly tradition of pardoning a turkey every thanksgiving. Reading from a prepared statement, Abe's attorney's Lorenzo De Pavo, explained that his client has no reason to accept a pardon because that woul...

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Funny story: A Turkey downs Russian fighter

A Turkey downs Russian fighter

Startled by Thanksgiving revelers, a turkey flew into a Russian fighter's engine, crashing the plane. Cranberry sauce was spilled inside the engine and gravy dripped on the pilot's shirt. The Russian pilot claims that the turkey had stealth capabi...

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