PENSACOLA, Florida – (Satire News) – A woman, who resides in Pensacola, recently told Pensacola’s ABC Affiliate Channel 44, that her size 44-DDDDDDD tits are positively 100% natural.
Hilda Brisquette, who is an unemployed prostitute told Channel 44, that at the age of 6, she was already wearing her mother’s size 36-D bras, as well as getting tons and tons of stares from neighbors, the mailman, the gardener, and old Uncle Uklid.
Hilda revealed that by the time she was 12, she was already having seniors in high school invite her to the high school prom.
She pointed out that everyone figured that she was at least 18 or 19-years-old.
Miss Brisquette said that she recently received a text from Dolly Parton telling her that looking at her humongously gigantic boobs made her feel like she was just a little old flat-chested schoolgirl.
SIDENOTE: One of Florida's leading knocker doctors gave Miss Brisquette a thorough body examination, and he concluded that Hilda's size 36-DDDDDDD are as real as Donald Trump's orange face.
