HACKENSACK, New Jersey – (Satire News) – Ear, throat, and mouth specialists had talked to 27-year-old Patsy Pillapalini about fixing her extremely unusual mouth defect.
Patsy, an unemployed dental hygienist, was born with what doctors refer to as Amofolisticocksus Non-Interruptus Syndrome.
They describe it as a person having a mouth that could very easily accommodate a family of koala bears.
The doctors pointed out that Amofo, for short, is very, very, very rare and has only occurred one other known time back in late March of 1469.
Information guru, Andy Cohen, stated that the individual was a male barbarian named Amad Shamooka Smith, and his fellow barbarians called him “Old Basket Mouth.”
Meanwhile, Patsy Pillapalini, told BuzzFuzz reporter Taffeta Kixx that six of her boyfriends have begged her to please, please not get the de-augmentation procedure done.
Patsy, who has an agent, (she does not like using the name pimp), told Miss Kixx that she has become the most popular girl in all of New Jersey.
She winked and added that she also gets ‘visitors’ from as far off as South Dakota, Guadalcanal, Indianapolis, and Bolivia.
SIDENOTE: Patsy told Taffeta that she is currently writing a book on her strange-as-hell affliction tentatively titled, “Damn, Will You Look At The Gigantosis Mouth On That C***S****** Bitch!!!!!!!”