MONTECITO, California – A member of Ellen’s TV show has stated that the daytime talkshow host has been extremely depressed as of late.
The insider says that the 62-year-old DeGeneres is feeling like she is starting to age at a much faster pace than her much-younger wife, Portia de Rossi, who is only 47.
Ellen told Sigmund Cottonseed, with Ipso Facto, that, at first, their marriage felt exactly like a May/December marriage, but lately it has started to feel more like a February/December marriage.
The two have been married for 12 years; last year, Sports Bet Gazette named them the Happiest Non-Sports Couple in America.
DeGeneres recently confided to one of her landscapers, that she is just finding it harder and harder to get it up.
Portia said that Ellen recently purchased some Viagra-like pills from a highly seedy source.
Portia later remarked that the little fuckers didn’t work.