WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Funny Celebrity Story) - The CIA is reporting that it is conducting a full-scale investigation into talk show maven, Ellen DeGeneres.
A spokesperson for the three-lettered organization stated that they received reports (including six videos) that clearly showed that DeGeneres was wearing boxer shorts that had been illegally manufactured in Nicaragua.
The CIA is upset because it believes that the counterfeit boxers are part of a shipment of 4 million counterfeit men’s underwear, that were manufactured by Nicaragua’s notoriously infamous Managua Muchachos Drug Cartel.
Ellen is maintaining that the boxer shorts, which feature a picture of Tom Brady, were purchased at a Macy’s in West Hollywood, by her wife, Portia de Rossi.
Portia was asked if she had purchased the boxers from Macy’s. She replied that she thought that she either bought them at Macys, or maybe at a Walmart, or possibly, she may have bought them from a homeless street vendor in Avocado Heights.
Meanwhile, Ellen says that she may drive down to Baja California until everything dies down.