PHOENIX, Arizona – (Satire News) – The 30 contestants who were to have participated in the 2021 Arizona Beauty Pageant have just found out that the pageant has been cancelled.
Pageant coordinator, Yarvonna Pumpkinstone, 51, told the news media that President Trump is extremely angry that the state voted Democrat for the first time in 24 years, so he has issued a Presidential Executive Order cancelling the pageant.
'Miss Yuma,' Lorella Bubblefog, 27, was so upset, that she broke out in hives, and says she cannot sleep, eat, drink, or play Words With Friends on her cell phone.
Mrs. Pumpkinstone stated that 29 of the 30 contestants have signed a petition informing the "Divider-in-Chief" that he lost the election, so he has to stop acting like a spoiled two-year-old and start concentrating on finding a cure for the Trumpapalooza virus.
The only girl who did not sign the petition is Yu Yan Chen, 'Miss Tombstone,' who just happens to be a niece of Senator Mitch McConnell's wife, Ling Ling.
Pumpkinstone has informed the news media that the pageant has retained the services of the famed, California mother/daughter law firm of Gloria Allred and Lisa Bloom.