HOLLYWOOD – (Satire News) – TMZ is reporting that Kim Kardashian will be appearing totally naked in an upcoming issue of Playboy.
Kim stated that she is doing it to get back at her husband, Kanye "The Pest" West.
She said that she has told him 13 times to give up his cockamamie running for president bullshit, but he says that she is not the boss of him.
Kim says she'll show him by letting the entire world see every inch of her skin.
She then divulged that she may even reveal some of Kanye's very intimate secrets, like he likes to suck his big toes, he has a man crush on Trump, and he loves to go swimming at midnight while wearing one of her bikini swimsuits.
The eldest Kardashian sister told TMZ that she has millions of male fans who want to see her in her birthday suit.
Kim pointed out that, at 39, she looks way better than many women who are 29.
Kris Jenner, Kim's mother, disclosed that Kim has a fantastic body.
The Kardashian matriarch said that Kimmy has no cellulite, no spider veins, no freckles, no scars, no tattoos, and only four freckles.
Former Dallas Cowboys receiver, Miles Austin, who dated Kim before she married Kanye, said that her body is a lascivious Egyptian temple.
Some of Kim’s other ex-boyfriends include Nick Lachey, Nick Cannon, Nick Nolte, and Nick Chickahominy, a Las Vegas female impersonator.
