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Peter Stringfellow's Severed Penis Attacks Man

Funny story: Peter Stringfellow's Severed Penis Attacks Man

Renowned Lothario Peter Stringfellow has died after having his penis severed by an intruder to the Playboy mansion in the early hours of this morning. The intruder claims he wandered in whilst "looking for a toilet" and mistook the ageing self-pr...

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A Long-repressed Beef with 1960s Cheesecake

My wife's in the other room, working on crafts, so I'm free to address a concern I have about Playboy models, especially those of the 1960s (although my concern really includes Playmates of every year). What's my beef? The absurd conditions or situations under which the magazine's photographers expect Playboy “readers” (read “voyeurs”) to believe (or to pretend not to disbelieve) woman—or Playmate...

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Frugal Penthouse Playboy Has Trouble Finding Quality Mistress

Funny story: Frugal Penthouse Playboy Has Trouble Finding Quality Mistress

To his dismay, penthouse playboy Earl Cook says that he's encountered unexpected difficulties in finding a quality mistress due to his intense aversion to spending money on anyone other than himself. An impressive example of pull-yourself-up-by-yo...

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Trump Campaign Reacts To Trump Sex Tape , "Not Everything Longer Than It Is Thick Out of Which White Fluid Comes Jetting in Successive, Pumping Streams Represents A Spasmodic Penis In The Undulating Throes Of A Massive Ejaculation"

Funny story: Trump Campaign Reacts To Trump Sex Tape , "Not Everything Longer Than It Is Thick Out of Which White Fluid Comes Jetting in Successive, Pumping Streams Represents A Spasmodic Penis In The Undulating Throes Of A Massive Ejaculation"

New York, NY - The Trump campaign today shot back at the Clinton camp over Clinton's characterizations of a year 2000 Playboy video in which Trump appears opening a bottle of champagne, surrounded by topless and scantily clad "broads" who bounce up a...

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Canadian Government to Buy Playboy Mansion

Funny story: Canadian Government to Buy Playboy Mansion

After only a few short weeks on the market, it appears that the Playboy Mansion has attracted a firm purchase offer from, of all parties, the Government of Canada. McKenzie Brothers Real Estate, acting on Canada's behalf, has revealed that their p...

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Magazine Associated with Norman Rockwell Paintings to Publish Nude Centerfolds

Indianapolis-"I only read it for the Norman Rockwell tributes." That is what editors of The Saturday Evening Post are hoping to hear from horny readers-old and young-when it starts publishing nude centerfolds of deceased and aging celebrities nex...

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Playboy to Feature Cats and Women

Playboy magazine is to include pictures of naked women and cats, as part of its redesign. Its owners have blamed the internet for making mainstream pornographic material freely and readily available to all. Playboy's target audience has drasti...

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Hugh Hefner Liquefies

Funny story: Hugh Hefner Liquefies

America woke up this morning to the news that their global sex guru Hugh Hefner had passed away. It is not so much the fact of his passing, for he was approaching his 89th birthday on April... but the manner. Our reporter for "U2R-FKD" followed the story. His housemaid for this month Eileen Dover who wishes to be known simply as "Miss February" broke the news. "Well, I went up to his bedroom as...

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Gideon Bibles Popularity Due To People Making Emergency Rizla Papers Out Of Them

Funny story: Gideon Bibles Popularity Due To People Making Emergency Rizla Papers Out Of Them

The secret of why there is still a continuing presence of Gideon Bibles and not wank magazines in hotels which lone businessmen frequent was released under the "Freedom of Information Act" this morning. The thin paper which the specially made Kin...

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Hugh Hefner Wants To Buy Colorado's Happy Joy Airlines AKA Pot Planes Airways

Funny story: Hugh Hefner Wants To Buy Colorado's Happy Joy Airlines AKA Pot Planes Airways

HOLLYWOOD - Billionaire mogul Hugh Hefner, who made his money off of gorgeously sexy naked women, has just informed the news media that he wants to buy an airline. Hefner, stated "Not just any airline mind you. I want to buy the Aspen-based Happy...

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Denmark's Beautiful Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt Denies She's Been Sexting President Obama

Funny story: Denmark's Beautiful Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt Denies She's Been Sexting President Obama

COPENHAGEN, Denmark - Danish Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt has responded to White House reports that allege that she has been sending text messages of a personal nature to President Obama. The very pretty prime minister did admit that she...

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Playboy Asks Denmark's Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt To Appear In A Nude Layout

Funny story: Playboy Asks Denmark's Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt To Appear In A Nude Layout

CHICAGO - Playboy Corporation mogul Hugh Hefner has offered the stunning blonde prime minister of Denmark, Helle Thorning-Schmidt $1.8 million to appear in a nude layout in his magazine. Hefner spoke with reporters and stated that he knows that th...

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Hugh Hefner To Sell His Playboy Mansion

Funny story: Hugh Hefner To Sell His Playboy Mansion

HOLMBY HILLS, California - Hugh Hefner, who is 87, has just announced that he plans to sell his California Playboy Mansion and build a new, bigger one in Denver, Colorado. The Playboy Magazine mogul told Tittle Tattle Tonight's Pico de Gallo that...

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Kim Jong Un Wants To Visit Hugh Hefner's Playboy Mansion

Funny story: Kim Jong Un Wants To Visit Hugh Hefner's Playboy Mansion

HOLMBY HILLS - Hugh Hefner has just let the American news media know that he received an email from North Korea's Kim Jong Un. The North Korean leader expressed a desire to visit California and tour the world famous Playboy Mansion. Hefner said...

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Voyeurism: It's not just for perverts anymore!

Voyeurism is the pastime of spying on someone who is unaware of his or her presence. were the victim aware, he or she (usually, she) wouldn't be lolling around naked in the first place, especially in the presence, seen or unseen, of anyone else (unless she is also an exhibitionist). If the voyeur is hard up enough to ogle someone in secret and there is no one available to ogle, he will usually...

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Playboy Playmates

In The Secret of Wealth and Happiness, Hu Humpher, under the pen name Hugh Hefner, founder of Playboy magazine, explains what led to his success: the Playboy Playmate. For anyone who may be visiting from another planet, a Playboy Playmate is a full-color, glossy, airbrushed photograph of a nude woman with a staple through at least one portion (and usually two) of her anatomy. She is also someti...

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"Playboy" launches Braille issue

CHICAGO, IL - Christie Hefner, Hugh's daughter and president and CEO now that her father, the magazine's founder and publisher emeritus, is encumbered by his having to wear Depends diapers for adults to avoid embarrassing accidents, announced during...

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Simon Cowell Wants To Buy Hugh Hefner's Playboy Mansion

Funny story: Simon Cowell Wants To Buy Hugh Hefner's Playboy Mansion

HOLMBY HILLS, California - Simon Cowell, alias The Sultan of Sarcasm and owner of X-Factor has just said that he is in the market for a brand new home. Tittle Tattle Tonight is reporting that Cowell was recently given a personal tour of the Playbo...

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Breaking news…

Trump Jr. Says That He Always Wanted to Be Separated From His Parents

That's why he can't understand the consternation at the border with kids being taken from parents.
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