The Former Dixie Chicks Will Be The Opening Act On WD-40’s Left Coast Summer Heat Tour

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 1 July 2020

image for The Former Dixie Chicks Will Be The Opening Act On WD-40’s Left Coast Summer Heat Tour
The Dixie Chicks have dropped the name Dixie and are now simply the Chicks.

NEW YORK CITY – A spokeswoman for the Irish heavy metal band, WD-40, has announced the band’s first United States tour, which they are calling "WD-40's Left Coast Summer Heat Tour".

She stated that the four Irish lads are excited to be performing in the good old USA.

The band is really looking forward to their first concert date, which will be in Avocado Heights, California, the home of the best avocado toast in the entire nation.

Lead singer, Doolin Tipperary, said that he hopes to meet Jimmy Kimmel, Khloe Kardashian, and Triumph The Insult Comic Dog.

Two of WD-40's singles are currently riding the Billboard charts. The songs are “I French Kissed Her Down On The French Quarter” and “I’m Gonna Keep On Keeping On Until Her Badonkadonk Is Mine”.

Meanwhile, the Chicks say that they have been practicing 17 hours a day, and they’ve got their 3-part harmonies working as smooth as melted butter on Beyonce’s thighs.

The recently-divorced lead singer for the Chicks, Natalie Maines, said that she is looking forward to spending some nice, quality, intimate time with WD-40’s lead singer Doolin Tipperary, who is single.

Natalie stated that the all-girl band was invited to visit the White House, but she said they would rather visit a meat processing plant that stinks so bad that vultures wouldn’t go anywhere near it.

The WD-40 and the Chicks tour is being sponsored by Hercules Brand Condoms, Fly High Airlines, and the Black Lives Matter organization.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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