Coors To Use Drones To Deliver Beer

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Sunday, 13 December 2020

image for Coors To Use Drones To Deliver Beer
The director of the Coors Brewery Drone Department demonstrating the new Mama Pelican 7000 Drone.

GOLDEN, Colorado – (Satire News) – The board of directors of the Coors Brewing Company has hit on an idea to improve on their delivery service.

Board of Directors Chairman Yusif Tayrus pointed out that the test program will involve delivering up to three cases of beer via a drone from the Coors Brewery to convenience stores or individual homes within a 25-mile radius of the brewery.

A similar idea was reportedly tested in Letterfrack, Ireland, back in April, but vultures kept attacking the drones, and then getting drunk as skunks on the beer.

The Blue Dragon Drone Company of Osaka, Japan, which developed the drone, has commented that their Mama Pelican 7000 Drone Model is fully capable of actually carrying up to ten cases of beer with no problem whatsoever.

They pointed out that the drone is totally sprayed with tangerine juice, which the vultures hate, and will not get within 20 yards of.

Coors is reporting that their chief director of security, Lizette Narcisco, 35, will be the first recipient of a Coors Beer drone delivery.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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