
Only Five Brave Republican House Members Are Needed To Vote In A Democratic Speaker
Disgusted with the neo-Nazi Republican party? All it takes is five Republican House members to vote for a Democratic Speaker of the House. Did you know that? Kevin McCarthy is giving away pots and pans and sets of dishes making all kinds of deals,…
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A Woman Born Without A Vagina Gives Birth To Twins
POUGHKEEPSIE, New York - (Satire News) - A 29-year-old woman, who is employed as a palm reader. recently made national headlines when she gave birth to twins. What made that feat so amazing is that the woman, identified as Windella Kobelli, was bo…
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The Austin-Based Bezos-Musk Inc., Has Just Purchased JetBlue Airlines
AUSTIN - (Satire News) - The Cloud 9 News Agency has just informed the flying public that the largest corporation in the entire world has just purchased JetBlue Airlines. Cloud 9 reporter Lexi Aspen spoke with a spokesperson for the huge airline a…
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The NFL Players Federation Names Cinderella Zephyr "The Best Female Comedian In The USA"
HOLLYWOOD - (Satire News) - Cinderella Zephyr, who utters more cuss words that lumberjacks at an Oregon lumberjack camp has just been named The Best Comedian In the USA by The NFL Players Federation. Zephyr who is 28, is in the Gunness Book of Wor…
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The Alamo Is Visited By More Tourists Than The Eiffel Tower, The Tower Big Ben, and The La Brea Tar Pits Combined
SAN ANTONIO - (Satire News) - According to Tittle Tattle Tonight reporter Pico de Gallo, the most unpopular, and most hated governor in the history of state governors, Greg "Eggplant Face" Abbott is catching hellacious hell for having the audacity an…
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Trump Said That He Is Thinking About Running For President on The American Nazi Party Ticket
DUCK DUNG, Alabama - (Satire News) - According to GOPicky Magazine, Donald "Butthole" Trump has finally come to the realization that the members of the GOP do not want anything to do with his predatorial stinking ass. Amos Soursuckle with GOPicky…
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A List of Ten Euphemisms For The Word Tits
HOLLYWOOD - (Satire News) - Ipso Facto News writer Fuchsia Garfunkel, who measures 38-24-36, has compiled a list of 10 words for the word tits. Miss Garfunkel, recently divorced her husband of 19 years, Simon Joe Garfunkel, when she caught him wan…
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A List of 10 Words That Melania Trump Chops All-To-Hell
LOS ANGELES - (Satire News) - Savannah Stiletto, with The Daily Max has followed Melania Trump ever since she landed in Staten Island from Slovenia, 26 years ago. Miss Stiletto, commented that Melly has been in the US long enough that she should h…
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Production on "Rust" Resumes With a Bang
In a controversial move, Alec Baldwin's movie "Rust" is resuming a year after production was shut down in New Mexico due to the death of cinematographer Halyna Hutchins, who was shot with a prop gun. The New York Post has described the film as “doome…
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The Pope Says That Donald Trump Is Positively Going To Go To Hell
THE VATICAN - (Satire News) - The Vatican Voice reports that Pope Francisco has told his Catholic flock that if there has ever been a hate-spewing SOB who needs to go to hell it is Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump. The pope said that when he does he…
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Scots told to limit headbutting to once a day, for medical reasons
The Scottish government has issued medical advice that headbutting could cause serious injury and should be limited to once per day. The advice based on a recommendation from the Scottish Chief Medical Officer, following a year-long study of the effe…
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A List of Tweets About Trump From Friends, Relatives, & Ex-Friends
MAR-A-LAGO, Florida - (Satire News) - Wild Whispers reporter Margarita Mixx has compiled a list of tweets about Donald Trump from friends, relatives, and ex-friends. Trump is one of the most hated individuals in the history of the United States.
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Vermont Is Planning On Blowing Up Their Recently Discovered Volcano
FROZEN FIDDLE, Vermont - (Satire News) - Veni Vidi Vici reporter Lexus Jo Dix reports that the governor of Vermont Phil "Great" Scott has informed the citizens of "The Green Mountain State," that he has already hired a demolition crew from Wyoming to…
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