
Local Employee Decapitated For Having Too Many Unexcused Absences
St. Paul, Minnesota. The corporate staff at Pete's National Decking Products, a factory that produces household furniture items and outdoor decking material, executed one of their employees last Monday at 12:30 pm. Thomas Waters, 42, was allo...
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Entire Republican party admits to wearing blackface
Mitch McConnell, house leader of the Republican party has admitted that on conferences, the entire party dresses in blackface, and often with Indian feathers, too. "We love it," said party member Geoff White. "We're embracing our inner negro. It's...
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Links and Bonds
My dad was a natural athlete, although golf was his Achilles Heel. He didn’t play golf, he didn’t work at golf, he subverted and corrupted golf. The only time my father ever drove anything 150+ yards straight from the tee, was when he was screaming p...
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In Moment of Weakness Pope Tells Trump No Priest Would Have Wanted to Molest Him
Things grew rather heated in the ongoing dispute between Pope Francis and President Donald Trump regarding Trump's proposed border wall, bringing out lesser sides of both parties. The Pope chastised Trump for wanting to seize the historic La Lomit...
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Did Pelosi Applaud Trump's Speech too Frequently?
Progressive congressional Democrats expressed great displeasure at the number of times House Speaker Nancy Pelosi rose to applaud statements by President Donald Trump during his State of the Union address, Tuesday. Not all television cameras were...
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Insecure, Manipulative, Vicious, Bossy, Emotionally-Unstable Correctional Officer Reaches '10 Year Work Anniversary'
Minnesota. Lisa Degner, 32, reached her '10 Year Work Anniversary' as an officer at the Olsen Correctional Facility last Monday. Lisa, who is well-known by her fellow correctional officers for being manipulative, bossy, incompetent, cruel, and...
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Police Car Chase Was Strictly In Accordance With Traffic Laws
A police car involved in a daring high-speed chase with another car that had been stolen by criminals last night, was driven completely in accordance with the rules of the road, as specified within the UK Traffic Laws. The 'chase', in Peckham, Lon...
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