Jacob Rees-Mogg reveals his reptilian past
As a Conservative MP, Rees-Mogg is often asked to validate his humanity, but in a recent episode of "Who Do You Think You Are" he was forced to reveal his 60% reptile background. Rees-Mogg's great grandfather is none other than Hissy the python, a...
Read full storyThe Not Nasty Other C-Word: Clueless
So, let’s get this straight. Steve Bannon called Trump’s older daughter, according to Michael Wolff’s book Fire And Fury, “Dumb as a brick.” No mention was made of that negative description. No outrage there. Doesn’t mean everyone silently agreed.
Read full storyKim Jong Un agrees to nightclub gig in Singapore to help offset expenses of upcoming summit
Breaking: Mr. Kim Jong Un, President of North Korea, is working on ways to help defray expenses of the upcoming summit with US President Donald Trump. Mr. Kim’s bill at The Fullerton Hotel, “a magnificent neoclassical hotel,” according to The Wash...
Read full storyDia/Dag/Day ocho/acht/eight, and the list of NUTTERS demanding entry to our fab NUTTERS BEACH CLUB is growing by the second, wonderful!
Dia/Dag/Day ocho/acht/eight, and the list of NUTTERS demanding entry to our fab NUTTERS BEACH CLUB is growing by the second, wonderful! All global NUTTERS are welcome apart from FAKE ones (You know who you are!) Firstly, I would like to congratulate Mr. Don Loren Hughes (a total esoteric, occult NUTTER) for obtaining the honorable position of 'pissed up barman'. The wages are crap, but it's...
Read full storyFarts - Are They REALLY That Funny?
I was once asked, by a woman in all seriousness, whether I really thought the sound of a rasping fart was funny. All I could do was howl with laughter. The reason for this is unclear, even to me. It could have been something to do with hearing...
Read full storyA Mar-A-Lago for North Korea?
A source within the White House, speaking anonymously, revealed today that the private letter written by North Korea's leader Kim Jong-un and which that country's former spy chief hand delivered to President Donald trump contained such major conces...
Read full storyElvis Presley Lookalikes Looked Nothing Like Elvis
An Elvis Presley lookalike competition in the pretty East Yorkshire seaside town of Bridlington yesterday, drew contestants from all over the world, none of whom looked like Elvis Presley. The 'Welcome To Elvis 2018' event is being staged at Bridl...
Read full storyDuck Incensed by Mouse's Moody Decision
DIZNEE'Z LAND, CALIFORNICATE—Mickey Mouse has put Diznee'z Land off limits to paying customers. From now on, the mouse decreed, he will allow “guests” to visit only some parks on some days. “Which ones and when depends on my mood,” the rodent explain...
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