Scientists Discover Condition In Growing Population In Which Acronyms Provide Sexual Stimuli
OMG! A growing segment of the population has resorted to the regular use of acronyms as technology use continues to rise. As society has moved from cell phone, text chatting, and the like, on to advanced forms of communication such as social ne...
Read full storyPrince William and Duchess Kate Receive Conjugal Logo Thus Creating New Beast
Some couples buy matching outfits. Royal couples get matching heraldry. A new Conjugal Coat of Arms for the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge blends William's royal shield comprised of English and Scottish Lions and a harp to symbolize Ireland with Ka...
Read full storyNearly One Year After Failed Mayan Prophecy Man Seeks Reparations
A man has spent nearly an entire year seeking financial reparations for undue stress, financial woe, and emotional damages related to life on earth continuing to exist. "I don't know exactly who or what group of person's specifically I have to go after, but these Mayan's owe me an explanation!" states Noah Oanaship. Apparently Mr. Oanaship had spent the year prior to the alleged prophecy d...
Read full storyTed Cruz Reads to Children in Hospital
Children being treated at a Washington, D.C. hospital got a welcome surprise Tuesday when Senator Ted Cruz (R-TX) gave them a bedtime reading of "Green Eggs and Ham," the classic Dr. Seuss story about health care reform. "I'm an Ass," he began, standing before the roomful of sick children in their hospital beds. "Ass I am. "That Ass I am! That Ass I am! I will not treat you Ass I am.
Read full storyThe Stunning Transformation of Senator Ted Cruz, 'I Resisted the Change but Have Surrendered!', Renounces Conservative Politics, Champions Obamacare, Embraces His 'Inner Mexican Laborer', Begs Obama for Forgiveness Barefoot on his Knees
In a stunning political development that has become the talk of Washington, Senator Ted Cruz announced yesterday that he has had a dramatic awakening and a complete, sudden transformation. He is no longer a Conservative. He is no longer a Republican.
Read full storyDating Website "Plenty Of Fish" Set to Face New Rival Site "Plenty Of Baggage"
Popular online dating site, "Plenty of Fish" is quaking in its boots as it learns of plans of a competing company to roll out a site called "Plenty of Baggage"(POB). The new format is said to be more conducive to members, old and new, that tend...
Read full storyMiley Cyrus Fed Up With All The Haters Announces She's Buying A Nudist Resort
VENICE BEACH, California - Miley Cyrus talked to Ryan Seacrest and she told him that she has had enough of hate-filled people criticizing her for her fleshy bodily displays. She remarked that she plans on purchasing a nudist resort located just ou...
Read full storyPaula Deen Swears The Marijuana Was Not Hers
NEW ORLEANS - The former Queen of Cooking who has now become the nation's number one persona non grata was in the Big Easy hoping to land a job as a greeter at one of the town's Cajun food restaurants. As she was leaving the restaurant after her i...
Read full storyThe Erotically Sexy Stacy Keibler Happily Admits She's Forgotten All About George Clooney
HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Stacy Keibler who possesses the longest legs in all of LaLaLand recently told a reporter for Hollywood Innuendo that she is totally over George Clooney. Keibler revealed to Tahiti Zeppelin that she had a great time when she was w...
Read full storyKanye West Says That He Will Make Jimmy Kimmel Lick His Shoes For Disrespecting Him
HOLLYWOOD - Kanye West is reportedly angrier that Kirstie Alley with an empty family-sized bag of Doritos. The hip hop rapper is furious and pretty near foaming at the mouth over the way he says Jimmy "The Chump" Kimmel disrespected him on his la...
Read full storyGeorge Clooney and Monica Lewinsky?
SAN FRANCISCO - Monica Lewinsky has told one of her co-workers that back during her blue dress days she had a crush on George Clooney. She said that she really liked him but of course she was kind of involved with the president of the United State...
Read full storyBritney Spears Explains The Baby Bump Rumors
LOS ANGELES - It's no secret that since being fired from X-Factor last year, Britney Spears has become a bit of a recluse in the world of glitz and glamour. She has gone from being on the spotlight before 20 million viewers of Simon Cowell's talen...
Read full storyJessica Simpson Says She Ready To Pose In A Nude Layout Spread
HOLLYWOOD - Jessica Simpson has said that after being pregnant for what seemed forever, she has finally gotten her fantastically, sultry body back and she is ready to show it off. Reports out of Tinsel Town state that Simpson has already been appr...
Read full storyTaylor Swift's Latest Crush Is A Real Shocker!
NEW ORLEANS - Taylor Swift performed before a sold-out crowd at one of her favorite venues, The Voodoo Arena in New Orleans. The country music songstress says that she loves the Voodoo because it has one of the finest sound systems in the entire c...
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