James "Pimp" Lipton answers the 10 questions

Mr. Lipton.... 1. What is your favorite word? BLING 2. What is your least favorite word? Chlamydia 3. What turns you on? Pimpin' 4. What turns you off? Broke ass mofo's 5. What sound do you love? The crumple of felt against my hair when I put on my hat 6. What sound do you hate? A screaming ho' 7. What is your favorite curse word? All of them 8. What profession othe...

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Austerity stranglehold sees shadowy Bilderberg Group meet in crappy Brit town

Funny story: Austerity stranglehold sees shadowy Bilderberg Group meet in crappy Brit town

Watford, Hertfordshire - A decidedly downmarket UK town once dubbed by Mahatma Gandhi as 'the arse-end of the universe' will be hosting this year's meeting of the smoke 'n' mirrors cabal known as the Bilderberg Group. Announcing the 6-9 June gathe...

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Dennis is not a Menace

Funny story: Dennis is not a Menace

Les Dennis, he of Family Fortunes fame, has approached the police demanding to know why he has not been arrested as part of Operation Yew Tree. "This is an outrage," said Dennis. "All of the people I've worked with through the years have been arr...

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Evidence of stone age cross dressing found in a French cave

Funny story: Evidence of stone age cross dressing found in a French cave

Archaeologists have uncovered what they believe to be the earliest example of cross dressing in a cave in Southern France. It is a find that they have dated back to thirty-five thousand years BC, smashing the four thousand BC record previously held b...

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'Lick my backside!' as Thatcher Spitting Image puppet pic channels new Queen stamps

Funny story: 'Lick my backside!' as Thatcher Spitting Image puppet pic channels new Queen stamps

Isle of Dogs, London - An entire print run of commemorative second class stamps featuring a new painting of Queen Elizabeth may have to be consigned to the shredder following an eruption of public disgust. Commissioned** by Royal Mail the portrait...

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Tebow and Gronk On the Road to Perdition

Two stars in the making seem to have fizzled out simultaneously. We have seen the supernova eaten by the black hole. They were extremes of philosophy in their sport just three years ago. Today they are examples of the washed up and out at a tender...

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Jurors Agree Jodi Arias Is Too Hot For Death Penalty

Funny story: Jurors Agree Jodi Arias Is Too Hot For Death Penalty

Another case of, "Juries Gone Mad" the good citizens of the State vs Jodi Arias were, "dead" locked on the decision to put self admitted killer Jodi Arias to death. The Judge had no option but to call the penalty phase of the trial a mistrial.

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Don't cry for me Argentina, says Falklands

Funny story: Don't cry for me Argentina, says Falklands

The Falklands has filed for an injunction after receiving numerous drunk-texts and inappropriate phone calls from Argentina, it has emerged. The Falkland Islands last night confirmed it sent a letter to the UN filing for a restraining order on Ar...

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Blackpool erect customs points

Funny story: Blackpool erect customs points

Blackpool, the ageless seaside town, has erected customs booths on all the roads into the town. "There are three major routes into the town," said Blackpool Community Chairperson, Tony Blackburn. "At each of these points, we are putting booths to...

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NASCAR'S Danica Patrick Apologizes For Crashing Into Her Boyfriend Ricky Stenhouse, Jr.

Funny story: NASCAR'S Danica Patrick Apologizes For Crashing Into Her Boyfriend Ricky Stenhouse, Jr.

CONCORD, New Hampshire - Danica Patrick told the racing media that she is sorry about the incident at The Coca Cola 600, in which she crashed her car into the car driven by her boyfriend Ricky Stenhouse, Jr. She wanted everyone to know that she is...

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Kirstie Alley and Melissa McCarthy To Star In "Liposuction - The Movie"

Funny story: Kirstie Alley and Melissa McCarthy To Star In "Liposuction - The Movie"

LOS ANGELES - TouchRock Films in association with Left Coast Libido Pictures has just announced that shooting will soon begin on Bandini Borrapelli's comedy Liposuction - The Movie. A spokesperson for TouchRock told Pia Confetti with Celebrity Glo...

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Bruce Jenner Says He's At His Wit's End And May Leave Kris Jenner AKA Mama Kardashian

Funny story: Bruce Jenner Says He's At His Wit's End And May Leave Kris Jenner AKA Mama Kardashian

BEVERLY HILLS - Many celebrities in the Land of Tinsel Town say that Bruce Jenner truly has a cast iron stomach. They say that the husband of Kardashian matriarch Kris Jenner has put up with more BS from the Kardashian gals than 99.9 percent of al...

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The GOP Wants Sarah Palin To Stay The Hell Out Of The Lower 48!

Funny story: The GOP Wants Sarah Palin To Stay The Hell Out Of The Lower 48!

CHICAGO - Political Salad Bar Magazine is reporting that members of the Republican Party have just about had their fill of Sarah "Snowflake" Palin. A GOP spokesperson identified as Sylvester "Kitty Kat" Katminovich, 68, stated that recent polls sh...

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Manu Ginobili of The San Antonio Spurs Addresses The Presidential Rumors

Funny story: Manu Ginobili of The San Antonio Spurs Addresses The Presidential Rumors

SAN ANTONIO - Manu Ginobili is widely considered to be one of the most popular San Antonio Spurs players in the history of the storied NBA franchise. Ginobili, who was born and raised in Argentina, was recently interviewed by Buckaroo Kazoo with T...

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Tom Cruise Reportedly Dating A Porn Star

Funny story: Tom Cruise Reportedly Dating A Porn Star

CUCAMONGA - Tom Cruise attended a music concert featuring Hokey Pokey & The Okey Dokey Band at The Santa Ana Winds Arena in Cucamonga. After the concert he was interviewed by Calcutta Cotton with Music Moments Magazine. He was asked if he h...

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Adam Levine of The Voice May Have To Leave The Country After His "Oops Moment"

Funny story: Adam Levine of The Voice May Have To Leave The Country After His "Oops Moment"

LOS ANGELES - In one of the worst foot-in-mouth instances to come along in a long, long time, Maroon 5 frontman Adam Levine remarked while on the air that he hated this country. Levine made the statement after two of his singers (Judith Hill and S...

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Congress Tells The Washington Redskins Owner To Change The Team Name or Risk Being Arrested

Funny story: Congress Tells The Washington Redskins Owner To Change The Team Name or Risk Being Arrested

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The owner of the Washington Redskins, Daniel "Danny Boy" Snyder, has been told hundreds of times that he needs to change his NFL's team name. Many organizations have told him that they consider the name Redskins to be highly off...

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